Authors Statement

Hey everyone I hope you guys are having fun reading my stories and 411 articles. I haven't been writing personal blogs because I just needed a break. I have not been doing well at all but I have been keeping a smile on my face just to fake the front. But I said I would never be fake and I am not about to start. It’s been over a month and my truck is still in the shop, I hate where I stay at and my personal life is crazy. I am not typing this to get any reactions I am just typing this to get some of this stress off my mind. I don't care who reads this. If my kid’s fathers read it you will know that I personal say all of you can GO TO HELL. I don't care what you guys say or think about what I write on my blog for real neither one of you have been there for your kids so all of you can kiss my ass. To think I only moved back up here so these sorry men could spend time with their kids. Shame they see them what 1-4 times a year. One has kids that don't know he got other kids, one sits on the phone and lies, and the other just don’t do shit but pay child support. Well all of you ant worth the spit to cuss you and you guys are nothing to me but a check in the mail. You guys don't support your kids emotionally only financially. I am letting it be known that my next move will be because of me and no one else will be thought of in that equation. Time for me to depend on myself. It’s crazy I have given so much to family, men, and friends but I haven't given myself anything. That's changing from this point on. I am putting it out there if you are not helping me when I am down and out DO NOT CALL ME WHEN MY CAREER TAKES OFF YOU WILL BE WASTING YOUR DAMN TIME....that goes for friends, family etc.

I am no longer going to think about other people and their feelings when it comes to my life decisions because no one thinks about me. I am not asking for anyone reading this to pity me or feel sorry for me because I don’t. Life lesson is all it is. It’s crazy how people claim to care about me and my kids but certain people don't give damn if we starve in here. But me being the nice person I am always looking out to make sure others are good. FUCK OTHER PEOPLE...In this game it’s me and mines call me selfish but I don’t give shit. Fella’s child support will be increasing in the next couple of months so look forward to that. You can't pay for other shit get a second job or keep your shit in your pants and don’t make any more kids. I don't care if you can’t afford bus fair walk. These selfish basterdes don’t do shit but lie to my kids, see how much you lie to them when we leave Maryland. Deuces.

SIGNED A PISSED OFF AUTHOR

My Wedding Day

August 11, 2011 this day is the most beautiful day in my life. I stand here getting ready to marry the one man I love. This man is all I have been wanting for plus more. I can trust him, I can love him, and I can be completely honest with him. I look into the mirror as I get ready, I hear guest coming down the hall way on their way to the wedding. I look at myself and say wow I cannot believe I am here. This is really happening and in less than 30 minutes I am going to have another man’s last name. No longer will I be single, no longer will I be dating, and no longer will I be the single chick in the club.


As the time grows closer and closer I feel like I need some air, so I leave the bridal suite to get a drink and some air. As I am leaving I hear a faint sound in the distance, of course I go to see and what do I see? I see my soon to be husband having hot sex with his ex-girlfriend. I didn't know what to do so I just started crying and ran back to my room before either one of them could see me. I sat in the room crying my eyes out mad as hell, thinking about all the money, blood, sweat, and tears I have put into this relationship and this perfect wedding. I thought to myself I can do better and I am leaving. As I was taking this dress off and getting ready to leave, my man's best man walked in the room to check on me. He could tell something was wrong with me but he chalked it up as last minute wedding jitters. He looked at me and I looked at him, like I had never looked at him before. Maybe it was the pain and embarrassment that made this man so desirable or maybe I was just trying to get back at my man by fucking his best man before I walked down this aisle.

David could feel that I was looking at him in a way I had never looked at him before. I had 15 minutes before I was going to be Mrs. Robertson, so it was time to get down and dirty. I locked the door and David looked at me as if he didn't know what was going on. As I dropped to my knees taking all this man’s dick inside of my mouth oh shit he tasted so good and he didn't stop me. He pushed all the things on the table to the floor and placed my ass on this table. He looked me in my eyes and asked me if I was sure I wanted this, and before I could answer he had buried his head between my legs tasting my pussy like it was his last meal. At that time I knew it was wrong but hell I didn't give a shit. With David’s hand over my mouth it made the sex more intense and I didn't want to stop. He pushed his big juicy dick inside my tight wet pussy, and fucked me until I came all over him. I haven't been fucked that good in a very long time. My man is one of those get in it and pound brothers, he's usually done in 10 minutes and ready to go to sleep.

Time got past us and my phone was ringing because I was ten minutes late. Shit I said "Damn I don’t want you to stop"....he looked at me pushed my face into the pillow and said "Fuck them we get there when we get there." Oh my God it felt so damn good to fuck my frustrations away and now I was back in a damn good mode. David asked me if I was still getting married, and I told him of course all that your boy doesn’t know won’t kill him. I did finally get down the aisle and married the man I love. He did me wrong the day of our wedding and I have been getting my revenge every since. Well time for me to go meet David and get my back blown out “LIKE I SAID WHAT HE DON’T KNOW WONT KILL HIM” I know you guys are saying I should tell him I saw him and be honest about all I am doing now but why tell something you getting away with. I am a very smart lady, I ran away from the room that night but not before I snapped a couple of shots. So when he finds out about me and his friend, I got the bomb to drop on him also. Always staying one step ahead.

SIGNED A VENGEFUL WIFE

Rules of the game called SEX

Rules: Like any game two people play their is a winner and a loser, hell sometimes its even a tie. But in the game of sex their is only one winner and one worn out loser. To play the game you must be physically fit and ready to through down. No holds bar, anything goes, and falls count anywhere. Playing this game you must know all the tricks, all the moves. You get scored on level of difficulty, and creativeness. You can play this game with one other other or with multiple players how ever you see fit to play the game. Each player can bring props into the sexual game. Vibrators, sex pillows, oils, sexy clothes, etc....whatever you may need to get the upper hand. Sex is a big part of a relationship and if someone tells you it's not they are lying, or they are a virgin. The game can be interrupted by pirates. Pirates are people who steal what you got, and leave you with nothing to show for it. In order to fight these Pirates you must fuck your girl or your man to the point of no return. Fuck your partner so damn good they wont even think about another person. If you are not fucking your partner Pirates will take your dick or your pussy right away from you and by time you realize what happened its two late.

There are different levels to this game you have one night stand, you have regulars, and life time partners. Regular and life time are the ones who needs to watch out for the Pirates, one night stand just protect yourself no ones judging you and if they are tell them to go to hell it's not like they never had one before.

The biggest rule of the game is to LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN....I can't stress that enough. Listen to who you are with and look at that persons body language. Fellas you can tell if you women is faking it but you guys don't ever pay attention that's why we've gotten away with it for so long. She can be moaning and screaming like you killing her, but if her body not shaking and moving you need to look into that. Fellas and Ladies its more then 3-5 sexual positions out their. Get you a book and look up some new shit to bring to your bedroom, don't be ashamed of what you do, who's going to know if you keep it between you and him. (Advice from author: Every time I get ready to have sex I do something new, weather its a new position, or a new outfit, and the man I got ant going anywhere..) Ladies be confidant about yours, weather your big, small, big ass, little ass, big titties, little titties who gives a damn. Work with what God gave you and he wont go anywhere. That goes for the fellas to. I didn't forget about you guys not at all..

 Fellas: Fellas don't brag on your dick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I don't care how big it is this is 2012 let it speak for itself. Don't brag on your pussy eating skills, let it speak for itself. Guys only send pics of your dick to a women you are trying to be with for the long run. Pictures will end up on some website with your shit photo shopped looking like you got more balls then dick. Guys if your girl don't want to try a new position then you try the new position. Get your game plan right before you step into the game.

Foreplay: Foreplay is a form of sexual activities to get you and your partner in the mood. Foreplay can be done in various different ways. You can do together in the bed or wherever you decide to have sex. Or you can  play over text message, Tango, Skype, etc. FYI...Before you guys think I am slut I have one man I am with..so I am just blogging some tips to keep your man home. I used to be one of the Pirates so you are getting some first hand info here. Dress up is a part of foreplay, put on a sexy wig and outfit on and pretend to be someone else. I have noticed a lot of men love to be dominated, told what to do. Work with that ladies and I am telling you he will fall in love. It might be strange for him at first but he will get used to calling you mistress, and you spanking him.

Final Instruction: Make the game FUN...sex shouldn't be work. If you are not having fun then don't waste your time life is to short and having a boring sex life along with everything else in the world is outrageous.

SIGNED: LETS PLAY THE GAME

Like father like son

 Sarah was in her mid 30's and her husband was in his mid 20's. To the outside world they looked like a normal couple. Sarah was a loving wife but at one point in time she was the biggest hoe out there. Alonzo thought he could change her and make her more respectful, and for a little while that did work. Alonzo was a fine tall light skinned man, he was the total package. He worked, he had his shit together and he could work it in the bedroom. Sarah had no complaints when it came to the dick action from this man. He would send her mind to places she had never been before.
One day Ronald came by, that's Alonzo's father. Now Ronald had been over plenty of times before talking with his son, and hanging out. On this particular hot summer night Sarah was home alone and she was walking around the house waiting on her man to come home. She had his favorite pink stilettos with a pink and black set. The house was only lite by candle light and you could smell a sweet flower smell in the air. As she was getting the house ready she heard the door opening and she just knew her man was home. Time to give him the loving he deserves after a hard day at work. With the candle going up the stair case heading to the bedroom he had no problem in finding what awaited him. As she lay on the bed with her ass in the air just waiting on him to take what he has been dreaming for while at work. She feels this strong hand on her ass rubbing her body. She felt him pull her hair and put his hands under her neck. She couldn't see him because she had a blind fold on. This was his fantasy and she was fulfilling it. He licked her hot body from the base of her neck all the way to the top of her ass. He wanted to taste more, he had her lift up and sit on his face. Sarah was shocked because Alonzo had never done that before, she was thinking this man is all about his tonight. Sarah couldn't control herself and ended up climaxing in his mouth. She wanted more and he gave her more. He pushed his thick dick inside of her tight and ready pussy. OHHHHH MYYYYY GODDDDD she screamed. She called out his name Alonzo what are you doing to me...The voice replied "I have been wanting this pussy for a very long time.
Sarah knew that voice and she knew that wasn't her husband. She snatched off the blindfold to see it was Ronald pleasing her like she had never been pleased before. She didn't know how to feel but she asked him to stop. He kept hitting that spot and STOP turned into DON'T STOP DON'T STOP...At that time Ronald knew he had her, he knew he could fuck her to sleep. He was giving her the best dick she had ever had, and he knew it. Whispering in her ear saying "I know you love my son, but I know he don't fuck and eat that pussy like it's supposed to be. That's what I am here for."
When Alonzo finally came home and saw how Sarah had the house ready for him, he knew  he was late and he knew he had to make it up to her. When he got upstairs she was laying in the bed fast asleep. He hoped in the shower, then proceeded to eat his wife's pussy. As he started to get into it she was  waking up moaning and said "OH MY GOD THAT FEELS SO GOOD...RONALD DIDN'T YOU GET ENOUGH EARLIER".

Signed
Can't turn a hoe into a housewife.

College Life

While I was in high school I lead the perfect life. Both parents, nice house, played sports, and I was very popular. But I was sheltered I had one boyfriend my whole life and we were going to be hours away from each other now that Iam in college and he's back home. First couple of months it was ok, we saw each other on weekends, holidays, and Skye. But after the first semester I started to realize I needed more, my body was calling out to be touched and he wasn't here to touch it. But I said to myself I wasn't going to hurt him so I stayed true to myself. Halloween night there was a Halloween party on campus, and of course me and my friends went to this party. I was dressed up like a naughty nurse. I had on the white leather dress, the fish net stockings, and the white leather boots with the hat to match. I was looking so good I could of fucked myself. While at the party I saw Tavone, this guy is in three of my classes and all I have been thinking about is how would it feel to have him fuck me. I have heard stories from girls in my dorm about how Tavone gets down. These girls say he fucks you gangster style. Now I have never heard of gangster style until I came here. Apparently gangster style is when the guy is really rough, like pulling your hair ripping your clothes off. fucking you all hard, and calling you a bitch or a hoe. I have never had sex like that before. My boyfriend and I had three positions: missionary, me riding him, and him hitting it from the back. Not saying sex with my boyfriend was boning but hey it could of been way better.

Sometimes Tavone sits next to me in class and all I want to say is fuck me right here on this table, can you make me your little bitch. When I saw him at the party dressed like Dracula I just wanted him to bite my neck, my nipples, and my pussy. Just nibble all over me. I guess my friends could tell something was wrong with me, because they rushed me to the bathroom saying put water on your face you are staring out to space. I broke down and told my girlfriend's what I wanted to do with Tavone, not caring that two of them have fucked him already I didn't care this is college. I told my friends I am going to fuck him in this bathroom and I want you guys to watch me get fucked. At first they were like what the hell, but then they said why the hell not. So my fiends hid in the handicap stall while I went to claim my prize. I went up to him and whispered in his ear "Look Tavone I want to see if all the talk in my dorm is true, I want you to fuck me in that bathroom. Only once." He looked at me and before he could say anything I took his hand and put it under my dress so he could see how wet and tight my pussy was. He didn't waste no time following me in the bathroom. As soon as we got in the bathroom it was on. I asked him to keep his costume on and lets role play. He pretend to be Dracula catching the helpless nurse. He caught me alright and when he caught me, he bit my neck, then my nipples, and then my pussy. Just like I dreamed he would. Tavone was living up to his reputation. He picked me up and put me in the reverse 69. I had never done a 69 position where we were both standing up. He eat my pussy like he was hungry for days and I sucked his dick like my life depended on it. I had climaxed 4 times from him eating my pussy. I wanted the dick so bad, and he gave me what I wanted. He had my ass bent over sinks, up against the wall. Pushing my face and titties up against the cold tile. This man was blowing my fucking mind. In my ear he saying "You wanted to find out what I was all about now you got it so take it and shut the fuck up." OHHHHH MYYYYY GOOOOOD is all I could say. I hopped on top of him and rode him front ways and backwards, but that only turned him up more. While I was riding him backwards he sat up gabbed my nipples pushed me forwards, stuck his finger in my ass and started fucking me doggy. This man never missed a beat. While getting fucked from the back I looked over in the stall where my girlfriends were at and these chicks were all playing with their pussy and licking on each other. That shit turned me on even more. To see these girls cumming with me just blew my fucking mind, and the fact he didn't know they were watching.
Tavone wore me out and my pussy was so sore, but I didn't give a shit. I was on cloud 9, 10, and 11. After we were done he looked at me and said "Tavone got another mouth peace." I looked at him and smiled. Got my clothes back on, went to the bathroom stall where these chicks were at and we just started laughing. We got our selves together went back to the party to have a great night. After that night Tavones reputation was out there for every girl to see, because what he didn't know was my friends were in the stall video taking the whole thing. So whenever a girl wanted to know about Tavone'swww.TavonesperformancePhotoshop is the best program out there.


SIGNED COLLEGE PRANK

The Cougar

People I am a cougar...I am 44 and I like men who are in there 20's. Call me what you want but call me a hot sexy women in her prime. I consider myself a cougar not only because I date me half my age but because I pounce when I see  man I want. Now I don't give a shit if he has a wife, or a girlfriend. All I care about is my pussy being worked over. Ladies don't hate on me because I am taking your man, I am willing to do what you young chicks aren't willing to do. I listen to him, I take control, I give him what he needs and wants. That's what's wrong with young women today they don't take control. They have to many excuse. I make a young man feel like he owns this pussy and I own his dick. This is 2012 ladies if you are not sucking your man's dick, I am...If you are not letting your man fuck you in your ass I am. If you wont give your man his fantasy oh honey I will. Call me a freak but you will be calling me a freak while your man's face is buried in this cougars pussy.

Cougar stands for a women in her prime who only dates younger men. That's what I am....I went to the club not that far from my house with my hair down my red short dress and no panties. I wanted the men to be able to sense that my pussy was in need. Man it didn't take anytime for them to be able to tell what I was there for. I was only there for 1hour and the men where loving me. Of course every club has bitches hating. But hate on bitches you don't have what I got between my legs...which is open season. Men see me and they know, what they see is what they are going to get, no cut cards. These men see experience not lack of. I found the right one he was tall handsome and I could tell he had a horse dick in them pants. That's all I needed to see and it was time to pounce. This man came up to me introducing himself as Michael. I didn't even hear his name all I could think of was fuck your name I want you to fuck me. I guess he could tell I really didn't give a shit what his name was I just wanted him to cease the throbbing between my legs with that monster of his. We went to the dance floor and as soon as he touched me he could tell I wasn't wearing any panties, and I could feel all that man hood up against me. The club was super packed so no one was paying us any attention. I dropped down to my knees and pulled his dick out just enough to lick the head of it letting him know I meant business. He bends me over pushes my dress up and slides his dick inside of my wet and waiting pussy. I screamed but the music was so loud no one paid attention. After that tease on the dance floor I was like fuck it lets go to my car. It's a good thing my top goes down because this big and tall man was long stroking the shit out of this pussy. This cougar pussy was dripping wet all over my back seat. I don't usually swallow on the first time but Michael made me feel a certain way no young man had ever made me feel. He was about to climax and I couldn't help myself I had to see what this man tasted like. It was the best thing I had ever tasted. 5 years have passed since then I am 49 and he is 30, and we have been happy together every since. This cougar has finally been tamed into a wife, but old ways die hard. I still get down but only with my man. Ladies age is nothing but a number, but having a man work your pussy over so that is all you can think about the next day is the thing.


SIGN: A SEXY COUGAR

Its all about you

Most times when me and my man are having sex its all about me. I figured this time around it would be all about him. I knew he would be home around 10 from work so I had plenty of time to get my man trap together. First I made his favorite meal, then his favorite dessert red velvet cake. I also cut up fresh fruits for him. I went into the bed room where I carefully laid red and white roses all over the bed. I ran my man a hot bubble bath with roses inside the tub. I put on his favorite perfume so I could smell so enticing. I heard the car pull up and I was just finishing up the last couple of things. This night is all about him. I put a note on the front door that said "Go to the Dining Room". He went to the dining room where he eat all his dinner, under the food was another message written beside the plate that said "Go to our bathroom"...In the bathroom it was a message written on the bottle of  wine that said "Get completely naked open this bottle of wine and get ready for your bath. As he climbed in the tub I came up behind with with just a rob on. I had him lay his head back as I washed every inch of my man. I washed him like he had never been washed before. I poured wine on his chest and drank it off. I could tell he was loving it because his dick was rock hard. He wanted to fuck me so bad but I wasn't done with him by far.
After I dried him off and pulled him close to me and teased him by licking on his chest his back hell I even gave him a couple seconds of head. Just to get him good and ready. I walked him to the bedroom were it was time for dessert. I blindfolded him so I could set up the desert. I laid myself on the bed placing red velvet cake on my pussy, putting whip cream and strawberries on my nipples and stomach. Time to take the blindfold off baby and eat your dessert. He was so shocked. He started licking my nipples, the my stomach. Now time for the cake he eat my pussy and this cake at the same damn time. He didn't bite me once but I didn't give a fuck if he did. This night was all about him. After he eat had dessert it was time for me to show him how I get down. I grabbed the candle and poured wax on his chest and told his ass don't move. My man likes that rough shit. As I was riding him backwards the door opened and who was standing in the door. Yes another women. I was making my mans whole fantasy come true I was riding his dick and this women came in ready to go. I moved off his dick and sat on my mans face then we were both sucking his dick at the same time. He didn't know what to do all he could do was shake and say baby I love you. I said  I love you to and this night is all about you. We did the whole threesome thing. She eat my pussy just as good as she sucked his dick. He fucked her but not as good as he fucks me. By the end of the night my man was beyond satisfied. This is a one time thing but the night was made to be all about him.

Stay At Home Mom

I have been a stay at home mom for almost a year now. My husband is a stock broker and our son is 10 months old. I love staying at home with our son but I miss having fun. Marcus used to come home and we would fuck for hours now he comes home and all he wants is a hot meal and a nap. I have done everything but put my pussy on his face and say eat me. One particular morning I was feeling hot and horny and the feeling just wouldn't go away. So I put our son to sleep in the other room and started pleasing myself. Thinking about how Marcus dick felt inside of me and how his hands felt all over my body. As I was just about to climax their was a knock at the door, I tired to ignore it but who ever it was; just wouldn't stop banging. Shit "What do you want"!!! I swung the door open and it was our mail man with a certified letter for me to sign. He must of been able to tell I was in the middle of pleasuring myself because he was looking at me as if to say " I know what you where doing in here". Although I loved my husband the mail man was looking so damn hot. He was sweating from walking up and down the street all day. I invited him in for some ice water. We have lived here for 3 years and he has never been inside the house. This fine black man must of had a sixth since because he knew I was checking him out. I had on a wife beater and some boy shorts with my ass hanging out the bottom and no bra. I knew he wanted it, but it was up to who would make the first move. I looked at the clock and said fuck it the baby wont be up for another hour or so and my husband wont be home until 5. I pulled him close to me and I could feel his hard dick pressing up against his shorts. This man wanted me just as much as I wanted him. I have been wondering for months what his dick might taste like. I wasted no time finding out. All I could think of was wow this man can deliver dick to me all day everyday. He wasted no time picking me up and taking my pussy on the counter top in the kitchen. Oh SHIT is all I could say while my juices flowed down his throat. My body needed this kind of fuck, Marcus hadn't fucked me in this kitchen since before I got pregnant. Fuck me Fuck me I screamed I tried to be quite so I wouldn't wake the baby. But I couldn't help it I had to let that go its been a long time coming. This mail man has dick for days and everyday at the same time since that day he comes over and delivers. I know I shouldn't cheat on my husband but hey my body needs things, and now I love being a STAY AT HOME MOM...

Friends with Benfits

He's a friend but he makes my body so hot if someone was to touch me they would swear I was sick. To think of how long its been since this has started. Being secrets lovers, playing the down low game man we are just to much. I see you with your girl you see me with my man but in the back of our heads all we can think about is each other. Going on double dates and our partners not having the slights clue that we are fucking like no other. She doesn't understand you and he doesn't understand me. She doesn't please you and he doesn't please me. But we are stuck, we are both thrill seekers so we play the friend game in public and the get it down game in private. It's so hard to deal with you coming over with her and my pussy is throbbing saying fuck her take me now. I am so hot I have to rub ice on my body to cool myself down. But it's not working the ice has me thinking about how you lick every inch of my body leaving no space left untouched. We are sitting at the table play cards you, your girl, my man, and myself. I get to the point I am like fuck it I need to go to the bathroom. I give you that eye and you follow. These two are sitting at the table with no clue, I pull you in the bathroom and its on. I get on my knees and take all of you in my mouth I just couldn't wait anymore. You bend me over the sink and taste me from the back with your fingers in my ass. You put your swollen dick inside of my tight wet pussy and fuck the shit out of me in this bathroom. Mind you our partners are in the other room with no clue we are fucking in this bathroom. Although it was just a quickie it satisfied me. I sat back in my chair finished my card game gave my man some when you guys left. I look over at the clock at see its 7am my man is leaving for work, I kiss him by. The door bell rings, and we all know who it was...Friend with Benefits

Good Morning

Hey everyone I took the day off yesterday because I was up all night...Not doing what you think I was just up all Monday night. I haven't pulled an all night er in a very long time. I talked to my lawyer yesterday about my landlord and his high fees that he's not supposed to be charging. So that is coming out pretty good for me. I just can't wait to move and get out of my financial bind. My truck has really put me behind and I hate it but I have to do what I have to do. I only have to fight this battle for a couple more months then life should go back to some kind of normalcy. I am not going to sit here and cry or worry myself to death about all the bad things going on in my life. I am focus on the good things going on. I am healthy, I have a roof over my head. You know we all take the little things for granted but when they are gone we really notice them. My AC is acting crazy because I have to tilt it out my window but I need another set of hands to do that. But it will get done this week. The past couple of weeks I have realized you can't change other people and you can only change yourself. You can't worry about how others are going to help you but how you are going to help yourself. These past couple weeks have opened my eyes and showed me I can only depend on me and only me to get all my goals met and that's why I have decided to go get my PH.D..I know I have been saying I am doing this or that for my kids and my family.This degree is for me and only me. Call me selfish but this is one of my personal goals. Well time to feed my kids breakfast and get some work done TTYL

GM

Good morning everyone I hope every ones weekend was pleasant. My weekend was ok nothing to brag about because of course we all know I didn't go anywhere. It sucks to when your vehicle is down during the summer times. The kids are out of school so you can just imagine the headaches I am have until I get my truck back to take them out and about. I had a really great night last night. It felt good to just let go and enjoy the moment. All I am saying is DAMN.....Ladies word of advice give your man a week to himself and you take a week to yourself and when you finally get back together it will be like the 4th of July. LOL Let me stop. It is so early and I have the slightest clue why I am up. Yea I do my oldest son woke me up. Whats funny is this boy can get up at 6:30AM when there is no school but when he has school I have to pull covers off him and damn near throw water on him to get him up. Well this week hopefully will be smooth and go by fast. Cant wait for next month all will be back to normal. Truck will be out the shop, kids will be going down the E.S with my mom and my sister for a couple of days. Which gives me time to play. I am still looking to move this year I just can't stand living here another year, I see myself going off on somebody elses child so. I am searching for a new townhouse, I feel its the best. Well time for me to go back to bed...Have a Blessed Monday. TTYL

My daily reading

Card 1 (The Sun) : How you feel about yourself now »

You are feeling abundant happy and joyful - if you don't, be assured that you are about to enter a period of success and fulfillment. This is a time of pleasure, vitality and good health, travel and holidays to be enjoyed. Good news around children or the conception or birth of a longed-for baby. The Sun heralds an ending to difficulties and a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones.

Card 2 (Death) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is absolute change, to end what you no longer want and start anew. You desire to transform your career or your love life, perhaps your whole lifestyle in general. However catastrophic such changes could be, embracing them will only make you grow in wisdom and experience.

Card 3 (Judgement) : Your fears »

You are afraid that the conclusions you've been wanting are delayed and fear any far-reaching changes ahead. Perhaps things aren't turning out quite as you expected for some reason - this is a period when your routine will be changed dramatically. Fear not, although events will seem to be moving at a real pace, any choice you make will change life for the better. If you are worried about any legal issues chances are they will be ruled in your favour.

Card 4 (The Moon) : What is going for you »

Despite the fear and bewilderment you feel, and the seeming difficulty of the path you have chosen, keep going - all will eventually turn out fine. The Moon is a good omen if you are in a clandestine affair; it also shows us how to be open to new and unexpected possibilities.

Card 5 (The Star) : What is going against you »

This is a period of tension and frustrations, you feel pessimistic and fearful that your hopes will be dashed. Any bad luck you may be having is primarily down to your self-doubt and negativity. Have faith that your luck will change.

Card 6 (The Hierophant) : Outcome »

Help is at hand. If you want wise counsel and moral guidance put your trust in someone you have a lot of respect for. Don't allow others to influence you too much with what they want you to conform to, be true to yourself. When considering your options go with tried and tested traditional values, rather than the unconventional novel approach. For example marriage is more likely to be your desire than a living together situation.

OMG Bored.com

I am beyond bored right now. I know I only blog when I am bored and I am trying to stay out of trouble. I noticed earlier this week when I am bored I get into trouble LOL...I never thought I would miss the gym this much I am still working out and watching what I eat while I am at home but I just miss the escape of the gym. I know as soon as I get my truck they gym will be where I will be at with my kids. I also miss going when I want to and not having to wait on other people to take me anywhere. To be real with you the only reason I am blogging is because I don't have anywhere to go and my truck is in the shop. But come next month this blog will be bare once again. Especially when I am out enjoying my summer and not having a bunch of demands on my life. After looking at my reading I see they all have the hermant card, basically saying this is my time to set still and we all no me and sitting still don't go in the same sentence but I am going to relax and collect my thoughts. I have also seen the lovers card in a couple of my readings. I am so not paying that card any attention right now. I could care less about relationships. I just want to go LOL I just want to put the kids in the truck and drive to the beach eat some crabs and some boardwalk fries. Go play some games and let them build sand castles while I just relax with a good book. But in due time due time Well time for me to collect my thoughts like the cards say, and believe in my choices. TTYL

Today's Reading

Card 1 (The Hierophant) : How you feel about yourself now »

You feel a need for advice or wise council or perhaps spiritual consolation. Someone, or perhaps immediate events, will provide moral and practical guidance. Perhaps you are considering being such a tutor, counsellor or spiritual advisor? You desire the tried and tested traditional values, so when considering your options, this approach will prove wiser than adopting an unconventional novel approach. For example, marriage is more likely to be your desire than a living together situation.

Card 2 (The Hanged Man) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to have it all, why should you have to give something or someone up? Perhaps you feel a victim and that events are not going as planned. Trust that this is a passage from one phase of your life to another. If you are not sure what or who you need to give up, trust that what will be will be, and will ultimately be to your benefit.

Card 3 (Wheel Of Fortune) : Your fears »

You are in fear of everything turning for the worse for you, perhaps you are experiencing a run of bad luck. You have to trust that most of what we fear never happens and as The Wheel of Fortune turns downwards against you, the wheel will naturally turn upwards again and bring good fortune to you too. This difficult phase will pass.

Card 4 (The Lovers) : What is going for you »

New love and commitment will enter your life, even if there's no one on the horizon - be prepared for a surprise. Throw caution to the wind and expect joyous and happy times ahead.

Card 5 (The Magician) : What is going against you »

Someone, most likely male, isn't quite what they seem. Trickery and deception cleverly disguised as charm and friendliness, so be sure that this person really does have your best interests at heart. If someone who you feel wary of is presenting you with a business opportunity, be cautious and trust your instincts.

Card 6 (The Hermit) : Outcome »

This is a time for you to be alone or may herald a time of loneliness. Take this time for quiet introspection and rest. Don't worry you will find the answers, but the Hermit signals a warning not to make hasty decisions. If you have been unwell this is a time for rest and recuperation.

GM

Good morning everyone. Today is one of those days where I really miss my truck...If I had my truck I would of went home last night and the kids last day would of been yesterday instead of today. This week hasn't been that bad, it's been pretty good. I am just hoping these next couple of weeks fly by so I can get my truck out the body shop and be able to do things for myself. I really hate depending on other people not because they don't help me but because I am very much independent. I am still waiting on this email and it's driving me crazy. My friends say stop waiting for it and it will come when it comes. We all know that's easier said then done. Right now I wish I was in the ATL for Greek week. Having a blast with all my peoples and just relaxing but I will go next year if I can. I don't know if I said this in my previous blogs I have decided to go get my PH.D in criminology at University of Maryland College Park next fall. I am so ready for my career to take off and then I can leave all the bullshit in the past. I also cant wait until August. We are hitting Bush Gardens, Kings Dominion, and Six Flags. I am going to have a blast this summer and I will not be sitting in this house looking crazy. I am thinking about going to stay with my mom for a week or two just to get away from all the mess up here. Plus I am moving in the next couple of months to another house. I have had it here....between my Landlord not wanting to fix shit and his high ass rent plus late fees and these kids out here that I cant stand I have got to get the hell out of here. I think this whole house is going to be empty by Christmas. I am trying to get out of here by September October, I hate moving but I got to do what I got to do. Well time for me to get these kids out of here for their last day of school and for me to get 4 hours of peace and quiet. TTYL Kiss Kiss

Daily reading

Card 1 (The Star) : How you feel about yourself now »

You feel there is hope, or if you don't, have faith - a tranquil period is imminent. If you have been ill, suffered bereavement or disappointment in love, take heart, good fortune is on its way. New horizons are indicated and you will feel a new zest for life. This is your wish card - if considering a new love affair, new job or career, or travel, then go for it. You may also receive a gift or gifts!

Card 2 (The Hermit) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to know what to do, as well as companionship or a lover as you feel somewhat lonely or isolated at the moment. Perhaps you are feeling exhausted and in need of a rest - if you have been ill this is a time for rest and recuperation.

Card 3 (The Devil) : Your fears »

You are afraid that it's out of control, you simply cannot resist this passionate attraction. Despite the fact its addictive and unlikely to be right, you just can't stop yourself. Whatever it is, a passion for someone who's not good for you, money deals that are too good to be true or any other kind of temptation, try to resist, as it is unlikely to have a positive outcome. If you're feeling low in self-belief and self worth and doubt your abilities, don't, have more confidence - its not too late to change direction.

Card 4 (Temperance) : What is going for you »

You are about to enter a period of peace and harmony in your relationship, career or life generally. You will find a way of handling difficult circumstances with calm confidence. Life is flowing at this time enjoy it.

Card 5 (The Fool) : What is going against you »
This is your Personal Court Card ( - what's this? - )

Beware of impetuous and impulsive decisions, they could cost you dear. Draw on your knowledge and experience, perhaps there are naive and immature beliefs behind your current desires. Are you looking to move onwards and upwards or run away? Look before you leap, you don't want to appear the fool do you?

Card 6 (The Moon) : Outcome »

Whilst you are confused and fearful and allowing your anxieties to hold you back, trust that all will turn out well in the end. Things may seem tough or confusing but stick with it, its right for you. The Moon is a good omen if you are in a clandestine affair and helps guide us to open our minds to new and unexpected possibilities.

* N.B. You must click the button. Using your 'enter' key will NOT work! *

Havent done this in awhile "My daily reading"

Card 1 (The Sun) : How you feel about yourself now »

You are feeling abundant happy and joyful - if you don't, be assured that you are about to enter a period of success and fulfillment. This is a time of pleasure, vitality and good health, travel and holidays to be enjoyed. Good news around children or the conception or birth of a longed-for baby. The Sun heralds an ending to difficulties and a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones.

Card 2 (The Hanged Man) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to have it all, why should you have to give something or someone up? Perhaps you feel a victim and that events are not going as planned. Trust that this is a passage from one phase of your life to another. If you are not sure what or who you need to give up, trust that what will be will be, and will ultimately be to your benefit.

Card 3 (The Lovers) : Your fears »

Ones heart is ruling ones head! You are so afraid of being hurt you are paralysed into non-action. To have or not to have? To stay or to go? Throw caution to the wind, great happiness awaits you if you can trust what you feel and ignore the fear and do it anyway.

Card 4 (The Star) : What is going for you »

A wish come true, this is a time of good luck and fortune, perhaps after a period of struggle and heartache. Good health, possibly after a time of illness, and good fortune that will give you a new zest of life. If considering a new love affair, new job or career, or travel, then go for it. You may also receive a gift or gifts!

Card 5 (The High Priestess) : What is going against you »

Insecurity is a devil that taunts us but only if we listen to that 'doubting Thomas' we all have in our heads. Ignore it. What do your instincts tell you? Perhaps you don't like what they say? Well you could always go against your instincts, but we all know what that leads to don't we!

Card 6 (The Hermit) : Outcome »

This is a time for you to be alone or may herald a time of loneliness. Take this time for quiet introspection and rest. Don't worry you will find the answers, but the Hermit signals a warning not to make hasty decisions. If you have been unwell this is a time for rest and recuperation.

Men got it made

Men have it made when it comes to relationships. There are several women out there screaming "There are no good men out there", well if you don't challenge them to be good men then you will never find one. Women don't have any standards anymore, they talk about the 90 day rule but they give it up in 10 days or the same day. You can't expect to get respect from any man treating yourself like a drive thru window. We as women have to upgrade our standards then the men will see we are not settling for the crap. I am not saying go out here and take a man for all he's worth...NO...You want a man that treats you like you are his equal show him you are independent that you can survive without him and he will look at you in a whole different light. Another thing "A MAN WILL AND CAN ONLY DO WHAT  YOU LET HIM DO, AND HE WILL ONLY RESPECT YOU AS MUCH AS YOU RESPECT YOURSELF".If you have no respect for yourself then he will treat you like the trick you are. Relationships are 25% honesty, 25% patience, 25% friendship, and 25% love....Some say why you put friendship in the percentage. I have learned you have to be friends with your man or women, no one wants to be with someone they don't like. In reality your friendship has to be stronger then all the other parts. Two people share a special bond no matter what happened in their relationships if they can fall back on friendship they can make it work.

But back to the main point of this blog.....Ladies stop saying there are no good men out here. Sit down and think of what your standards are and what you want your man to have or whatever. Go from that draw from what you want and stay true to yourself. Remember men are going to mirror who you are. What I mean by that, if you put up with your man cheating on you then he will do it again, especially if you don't have any consequences for him. If you want to get married ladies don't stay with a man for half your life wondering why he hasn't asked you to marry him. When you haven't forced this mans hand. That's why I said men have it easy, some women will put up with the dumbest crap to say they are in a relationship and post it on their Facebook page. But why do that when you are not happy with what you have at home. The man you have might be the man for you and he might be a good man, if you make him be. Men are like children they are going to try to get away with whatever they can. You tell a child don't touch the stove because its hot. You tell your man the same shit "Don't mess around on me or you will be out on your ass" and mean it. He will think twice if he loves you. If he don't love you then hey brush yourself off and try another. Well time for me to see whats cracking up in here...and maybe take my own advice and see where my prince charming is....LOL Good night peoples TTYL  Kiss Kiss

I dont know

The reason I titled this blog I dont know is because I dont have the slightest clue on how I feel about certain things happening in my life right now. Right now I am waiting on my career to take off and I don't want to go back to school for my PH.D but if I have to then that's what I will do. As for my personal life I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I feel letting go of my past and moving on from all the crap that happened last year is really helping me grow. But in a way I can admit somethings have changed in my life that have taken me to the point of no return. It's sad but when its done its done. I can't spend my life looking backwards anymore. I can't sit in my bed and cry myself to sleep and be up all night pounding my head about if I am making the right decision for myself. All I have ever asked is to be happy and for a long time I haven't been happy. I can honestly say I tired but I know where my heart is and where it is not. I will always love him but I can't go into working it out mode when I have feelings for another man. I don't know what to do, this is when life is really sticky and crazy. I just need a vacation and a couple of months go by then maybe my mind will be clear. Well got to go back to class. TTYL

Womens breaking point

Every women has her own breaking point when it comes to relationships. Some women dont stand for cheating, some dont stand for lying and some dont stand for financial security. But whatever her breaking point is its here's to have. I have been pushed to the point some would think it was the breaking point in my previous relationships. But hey I might not of been ready. I sit and think about a good friend of mines who I thought was at her breaking point but hey she's not and as her friend I can only respect that. When a man hurts a women she can do one of two things ( Stay with the man and work it out, or leave and move on with her life). I have done both in my life time and I am telling you neither one is easier then the other. Staying just makes everything that man does look suspect and moving on just means its another failed relationship under your belt. When a women is fed up she knows, no matter what anyone else may say to that women when she is tired she is tired. Women are in abusive relationships everyday, you have plenty of people who say "Why is she with him, I would leave, she's crazy", but in reality she's just not tired of getting treated like a punching bag. I stayed in certain relationships that I knew were toxic only because I wasn't ready to leave. But when I was ready to go I left. I have met my breaking point time after time and I will continue to walk down the road with my head held high and not care what others have to say, because this women knows her breaking point and she will not stand for a lying, cheating, no good man.
One day I will find the right man for me, I will settle down and be able to say he loves me for me and not for what I can do for him, or where I can get him in life. I will not be a booty call or a friend with benefits I will be a loving wife, mother, and friend. But please believe I will always stay true to myself and my breaking point. TTYL

A new start

Today I sat back and thought about where my life is headed and where I want it to go. I have made myself some serious long terms goals. I plan on buying my first house in 2014 and I plan on being settled down by then in a strong healthy relationship. I have also decided to further my education and get my PH.D in Criminology and my first choice school is University of Maryland College Park. While thinking about my life I realized I have to stop this back and forth game between these two men. It's really getting old and one is trying to put demands on me about the other and I really dont have time for it. But I will say both of these guys are there for me when I need them to be, but one is only there when it benefits us working out. Not saying he don't care about me, but if we dont have any shot at working on anything I am left high and dry. But not the other one, we can have a disagreement and thats all it is a disagreement. 10 mins later we are cracking up about something else. I am very big on loyalty and trust. Right now I am going through a hard time and its funny you see people for who they are when you are going through your hard times. You see the goodness as well as the ugly. When I need something I don't have to ask one of them to do anything he just knows I need help and if he can do it he's there for me no matter what personal choices I have made. That's all I ask from all my friends let me make my own choices but if you don't agree with them hey its my life. I will still be cool with you if you don't agree with my choices I just don't want anyone in my corner who's only there if I do what they want me to do. I am just not that type of person when it comes to my personal life.

I have my kids to think about, but I also have myself to think about. I know my kids want me to be happy but I have to ask myself who am I more happier with. Who makes me smile, who's there for me, and who do I think will always be there for me. But not only me who can be there for my kids as well. I am a package deal I don't want my kids to be happy and I am miserable or I am happy and my kids are miserable. We all have to be happy or nothing will work. I am not settling anymore, I want it all and if one man cant give it to me then their are plenty others out there. That's how I am looking at it from now on. Well time for me to get somethings done TTYL