Hey people

Hey everyone I know its been awhile since I been on line blogging but my life has been so crazy, but crazy in a good way. I am packing up to move in November, I cant wait to get out of this house and leave all this drama behind. Although I lost both of my aunts in less then a month things have turned around for my family. I am currently planning a family reunion with my cousin, I even talked to my brother last week. No need to hold a grudge life is way to short. I am happy my hair has grown out and I can say me and Dre have came along way in our relationship. To finally get those feelings out that have been held back for months is a weight lifted off my shoulders. Although I am in a relationship with someone else we both know how each other feels and there is no more grey space. I love him he loves me and if I wasn't in a relationship we would probley be together but for right now we are always going to be there for each other thats just how we do.

I can say my man is very good to me, although there are little things he does that gets on my nerves but no ones perfect. For the first time in a long time I feel like I am in a real relationship. Playing games, going out (Guess what I dont have to pay my man works), having relaxation time at his house. Hell I never really liked big dogs but wen I am over his house I am playing with a 1 year old pitbull. I am so happy, I just needed to leave my past behind and move forward with my life. You know what they say "We fight to keep the bad relationship when the good man is right in our face, or around the corner". I realized why my last relationship didn't work and wasn't going to work out. That was because I wasn't in love anymore. I am getting all the love I have been looking for plus more. My kids are happy that mommy is happy. Life is good peoples. Hope everyone is goodand TTYL Kiss Kiss.

The week

This past weekend was crazy. My kids were gone for a whole week and time is going by so fast. This past weekend was to much. I went over my cousins went to see my other Aunt in the hospital then went and hung out with someone who wants to be the man in my life. Now this man is the sweetest man ever. We so much fun until me him my bestie and his boy started drinking. Its clear this man cant drink. I am not going to go into details about the time we spent together but he has potential to be that one. When we were together it was so peaceful. He wants to make this work but he knows i have stipulations. I can say one thing this man shows me what I need and what I want out of a relationship. He is strong and not a push over it feels funny to be with someone other then Dre but he knows how I feel about him and that our relationship is an ever lasting one. This past week I also got some bad news I lost another aunt. She has been fighting for years now and God just took her home. It's been a bad couple of weeks in my family but we are making it through. I realized some things about myself this past week and somethings about others in my life. I feel great about my decision to start this new relationship, no lies, no drama, and no bullshit. Spending the past 4 days with him I got to know more about him and I am ready to find out much more. The question is will my feelings for Dre cloud my judgement. I am not going to lie I love Dre but i wanted more and he just wasn't ready for that. Like he says "If your not taking a shit get off the pot". I am sit back and enjoy my time with my new man and still know that Dre is there for me through thick and thin just as I am there for him. We are thick as thieves, but I want more.

Whats on my mind

Today is August 11, 2012. Today I was supposed to be getting ready to get married. Having the wedding of my dreams but due to unforeseen events that will not be happening. I knew today was coming but I figured I would be able to not think about it and just go on with my life like it never meant anything. But I cant. I cant sit back and just forget about what today was supposed to be. Now I know some are saying why not? I picked this day to get marred on, I had a huge wedding planned with a cake from Cake Boss in NJ. But none of that is happening right now. Soon with the right man. Yes I said the right man. There was to many people in my last relationship. There was to many lies, cheating, and playing around in my lat relationships. Well I just had to get this off my chest. I may be laying with someone else but he knows what today was supposed to be and he respects the fact I feel sad about things that happened in the past. I know we cant change what happened in the past but I am in a good space right now. I am being honest about whats going on and my eyes are wide open. Time to hit the bed.

Kiss Kiss TTYL

Good Day

Feeing good today. Talked to my homegirl about moving on. The dating sceen is still crazy as ever, but I got it down. What I mean by that is weeding out the crazy ones. What I like about dating is not having to come out my pocket for anything that whole night.See I am not used to that, my last relationship I paid all the time so it feels good. It feels good to have a man call me who wants to be with me and only me. This man is holding me down in my time of nebed and its something i have been wanting for a very long time.Being able to pick up the phone say my phone or cable bill is due, and i hear dont worry about it and the bill gets taken care of. Time for a change when it comes to relationships

Hey Hey

Hey Hey people hows everything going? Haven't been online for a little while I have been so busy living my life. Life has been hard had some real set backs but that's life. My Aunt passed away and yes I took it hard but I had family and friends there to help me through those hard days. I am back dating again and I am telling you the dating world is a huge mess. Since when have men became so damn sensitive. I have been out with men who all cry when I don't drop what I am doing and tend to their needs. Hell I have kids I do that for. I swear every time I don't answer my phone its some man having a dying emergency. I just want to say look fellas I am single and I don't have to jump when you call. I am just not doing it. Sometimes I feel the need to give up on dating all together. But I can say their is one man that does understand me. I talk to him about these lame dudes and we just sit back and crack up. He knows me better then any man right now, and some say our relationship is meaningless but that's far from the truth. I bet you guys are reading this saying "Hello why are you dating when your perfect man is right there." This weekend was supposed to be my wedding day, I thought I was going to be depressed and feeling down but I am not. I have realized that life is to short and you have to leave the past in the past and move on. Whatever GOD sees fit for my life then thats whats going to happen. If I was meant to get married this weekend then it would of happend but thats not the case. So yes I am looking for Mister right and not mister right now. Who knows mister right might come before I even realize it.

Who Should I Choose

I have two good men in my corner
Both have their good points and both have their bad
One says I love you boo
The other says I love you too
One says I will never lie
The other says baby with out you I will die
One says baby I will never break your heart
The other says baby can we have a fresh start
I look at you both and think of the times we have had
I look at one of you and sometimes I get intently mad
One takes me for a joke and one takes me serious
I think about the times I've had and I sometimes get furious
To be in love with two men at one time
Knowing one of you dropped me like a dime
To roll over and see you laying next to me
I have that sense that everything is goin to be alright
You are both there for me when I need you
But I can't live my life being pulled between the two
The one I want has to want me
The one I need has to be able to see
me for who I am not not try to change me
Looking at things sometimes I am crazy and confused
But at the end of the day I know Who I shuld Choose

The new neighbors

I finally got to meet my new neighbors and they seem to be a nice couple. They are both in their mid 30's and not that bad looking of a couple. He is tall and built and she is around 5'5 but she's not small she is thick for he height. One day I was making coffee and I heard this noise so me being me I went to my window and what did I see. I saw my neighbors fucking in their living room. Now usually I would of pulled my shade down and went back to my normal routine but it was something about them that wouldn't let me. The next thing I knew I was on my sofa playing with my pussy and thinking about being over their with my neighbors. She was loud and I could hear her crying out and moaning his name..."Thomas don't stop ohhh God please don't stop." I wanted to be right in the middle of all that, I wanted his name to come from my mouth. I wanted both of them to taste my wet juicy pussy. I know how to please a man I just don't have one right now, but I have always wanted to test my skills in pleasing a couple both man and women. So I put my plan i place.

The next couple of weeks I watched my neighbors have morning sex in their living room and I finally got up the courage to ask them over for dinner. I knew by me and her being the same size he would like my outfit I had own. The only difference was my ass and titties were bigger then hers. I put my dress on with no panties making sure my nipples stayed hard in this dress I turned the AC on high. I wanted them both to see my juicy nipples in my dress and watch my fat ass jiggle as  walked. The door bell rang but before I opened the door I oped my window so they would be able to see I have a front eye view into their living room. When I opened the door to my surprise Thomas and his wife had brought his brother Marcus with them. Now don't get me wrong Marcus was fine as hell but it through me off just for a minute. I got myself together and played the game. As I was serving dinner I could feel Marcus steering at me and he wasn't just steering at me he was undressing me with those eyes of his. I said oh shit he wants it and he wants it bad. As dinner was coming to an end I went into the kitchen to start cleaning up and Marcus followed me, standing behind me whispering in my ear, "I know you don't have on any panties" right after he said that I felt this strong hand reach under my dress and start rubbing my pussy. I almost dropped a dish in the sink, I couldn't even say no. All I could think about was how good it felt with his fingers inside my wet pussy,and his other hand under my throat pulling be back towards him. I had forgot all about his brother and his wife, I landed over the sink hoping he would fuck me right their but he just slapped my ass and said lets go chill with them. As I walked into my living room I could tell Thomas was playing with her pussy, because her eyes were in the back other head and she was not paying attention to anything. Myself and Marcus sat on the love seat across from Thomas and  Carrie realizing these two were playing around made me want to play around with Marcus.
I got on my knees and leaned over grabed Marcus dick and slid my mouth from the top to the bottom. He grabbed the back of my head and let out a loud moan. Oh SHIT HE SAID.....As my mouth was going up and down on his hard dick I felt this strange feeling go through my whole body. It was a feeling I couldn't describe. I turned around and saw Carrie eating my pussy from the back and Thomas fucking her from the back. OH SHIT I get all I want plus a extra dick. This is what I wanted from the start and adding Marcus was a bonus, a cherry on top of the ice cream. I climbed on top of Marcus sliding his hard dick inside my tight awaiting pussy. I was riding him backwards so Carrie nd I could both suck his dick at the same time.Oh shit this was blowing my mind, all I could think was is this shit real or am I dreaming. It was time for me to see what Thomas felt like, and see what she tasted like. I have been wondering for weeks what's the deal with all the screaming and I found out. This man's dick flet like he was hitting the top of my stomach. Oh shit and she tasted so good, I could tell I knew what I was doing because she couldn't keep still and Marcus had his dick in her mouth. This ween on for hours and we all passed out in my king sized bed. Moaning came and it was on again. All I can say is th rest of the year was awesome, having couple sex is something everyone should try. Marcus and myself are a couple now and we still enjoy couple sex. It's something to spice up your relationship and keeps both you and him happy.

Signed New and Improved...

Why women get caught between two men

Women are the real players in this whole game called relationships. Men only play women because certain women aren't paying attention to their mates and heir surroundings. Every women could have two men and neither man know about each other or the side man knows the truth. But ladies only tell your side man the whole story if you think he can handle the truth, you don't want his ass going postal and blowing your spot up. Women get caught up when they start making the side man the main man. You can't just make the side man the main man in a day or two it takes a wile you have to make sure all your feelings are gone for the main man first. If no you will be caught between two men. Ladies we have all been their caught between two men and not wanting to hurt no ones feelings. But when you play the game of having a man and a side man someones feelings are bound to get hurt and it could be your feelings. Both men could say the hell with it and you are left looking dumb, but that's the price you pay when you play the game.

I have noticed a lot of women say they have male friends instead of saying I have a man that I just sleep with. I am guilty of saying that also but that friendship could turn into something that neither one of you could imagine. The next thing you know both of you are saying I love you and looking at each other like you are crazy. Just wondering how in the hell did we get here. Ladies the main problem we all have is sleeping with our mail friends. Once you sleep with them the friendship can never be the same.You will be jealous if he gets a women and he will be jealous if you get a man. But neither one of you can say lets be together because you have told yourselves it would never work.

Then we have the main man that's either in your life or coming back into your life and you don't know what to do. My advice would be listen to your heart and you mind. Don't listen to friends who's relationships are jacked up, if they can't keep their own shit together they can't help yours. You have to think about who loves you more, who's going to be their for you and yours, and who has your heart and best interest at heart. That will clearly tell you which man you should be with and which one should remain a friend.

SIGNED Confussion

My latest reading

Card 1 (The Chariot) : How you feel about yourself now »

You feel everything is a constant battle at the moment, but persevere and you will triumph in the end. Expect some good news that will help you to keep going until you achieve your goals. This is a time of movement and change and of conflicts ending in victory. You may well consider a journey that relates to work or go for that new car you've been looking at.

Card 2 (The Fool) : What you most want at this moment »
This is your Personal Court Card ( - what's this? - )

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is just to be happy, and you are searching for the one thing that will bring happiness. You want a new start but feel unsure of what you want or where you want to go. Romantically you have mixed feelings regarding another - part of you wants to enter the relationship wholeheartedly, part of you wants to hold back. So if you are in a relationship that empowers you, stay, if not it is time to move on.

Card 3 (Death) : Your fears »

You are afraid of experiencing turbulent and catastrophic change, as we all are, yet challenging such transformation in our lives helps create brand new opportunities. If you are experiencing or have just experienced losing a job, a bereavement, divorce or the end of a relationship, these changes will allow brand new opportunities into your life.

Card 4 (Judgement) : What is going for you »

Brand new potential, an opportunity which once given must not be ignored, a new project, decision or relationship that could affect the rest of your life. You will enjoy success and enjoyment for past efforts, events will pick up a pace and the outcome will be quicker than expected.

Card 5 (The Lovers) : What is going against you »

Are you suffering in silence in an unhappy relationship or feeling very lonely? Do you have the courage to make the decision you really know you should make? You have a great sense of duty but are you happy? A difficult decision has to be made - have courage and you will achieve emotional happiness.

Card 6 (Strength) : Outcome »

Courage and self-belief is what you need to succeed. You may already feel overflowing with this, and if so there's no doubt you will achieve what you want with your career, finances and love life. If you are feeling negative, look inward for that strength and courage, you know you are capable of having self-belief and you'll reap great rewards.


This reading really helped me with certain decisions I am strgglng wth.

Authors Statement

Hey everyone I hope you guys are having fun reading my stories and 411 articles. I haven't been writing personal blogs because I just needed a break. I have not been doing well at all but I have been keeping a smile on my face just to fake the front. But I said I would never be fake and I am not about to start. It’s been over a month and my truck is still in the shop, I hate where I stay at and my personal life is crazy. I am not typing this to get any reactions I am just typing this to get some of this stress off my mind. I don't care who reads this. If my kid’s fathers read it you will know that I personal say all of you can GO TO HELL. I don't care what you guys say or think about what I write on my blog for real neither one of you have been there for your kids so all of you can kiss my ass. To think I only moved back up here so these sorry men could spend time with their kids. Shame they see them what 1-4 times a year. One has kids that don't know he got other kids, one sits on the phone and lies, and the other just don’t do shit but pay child support. Well all of you ant worth the spit to cuss you and you guys are nothing to me but a check in the mail. You guys don't support your kids emotionally only financially. I am letting it be known that my next move will be because of me and no one else will be thought of in that equation. Time for me to depend on myself. It’s crazy I have given so much to family, men, and friends but I haven't given myself anything. That's changing from this point on. I am putting it out there if you are not helping me when I am down and out DO NOT CALL ME WHEN MY CAREER TAKES OFF YOU WILL BE WASTING YOUR DAMN TIME....that goes for friends, family etc.

I am no longer going to think about other people and their feelings when it comes to my life decisions because no one thinks about me. I am not asking for anyone reading this to pity me or feel sorry for me because I don’t. Life lesson is all it is. It’s crazy how people claim to care about me and my kids but certain people don't give damn if we starve in here. But me being the nice person I am always looking out to make sure others are good. FUCK OTHER PEOPLE...In this game it’s me and mines call me selfish but I don’t give shit. Fella’s child support will be increasing in the next couple of months so look forward to that. You can't pay for other shit get a second job or keep your shit in your pants and don’t make any more kids. I don't care if you can’t afford bus fair walk. These selfish basterdes don’t do shit but lie to my kids, see how much you lie to them when we leave Maryland. Deuces.

SIGNED A PISSED OFF AUTHOR

My Wedding Day

August 11, 2011 this day is the most beautiful day in my life. I stand here getting ready to marry the one man I love. This man is all I have been wanting for plus more. I can trust him, I can love him, and I can be completely honest with him. I look into the mirror as I get ready, I hear guest coming down the hall way on their way to the wedding. I look at myself and say wow I cannot believe I am here. This is really happening and in less than 30 minutes I am going to have another man’s last name. No longer will I be single, no longer will I be dating, and no longer will I be the single chick in the club.


As the time grows closer and closer I feel like I need some air, so I leave the bridal suite to get a drink and some air. As I am leaving I hear a faint sound in the distance, of course I go to see and what do I see? I see my soon to be husband having hot sex with his ex-girlfriend. I didn't know what to do so I just started crying and ran back to my room before either one of them could see me. I sat in the room crying my eyes out mad as hell, thinking about all the money, blood, sweat, and tears I have put into this relationship and this perfect wedding. I thought to myself I can do better and I am leaving. As I was taking this dress off and getting ready to leave, my man's best man walked in the room to check on me. He could tell something was wrong with me but he chalked it up as last minute wedding jitters. He looked at me and I looked at him, like I had never looked at him before. Maybe it was the pain and embarrassment that made this man so desirable or maybe I was just trying to get back at my man by fucking his best man before I walked down this aisle.

David could feel that I was looking at him in a way I had never looked at him before. I had 15 minutes before I was going to be Mrs. Robertson, so it was time to get down and dirty. I locked the door and David looked at me as if he didn't know what was going on. As I dropped to my knees taking all this man’s dick inside of my mouth oh shit he tasted so good and he didn't stop me. He pushed all the things on the table to the floor and placed my ass on this table. He looked me in my eyes and asked me if I was sure I wanted this, and before I could answer he had buried his head between my legs tasting my pussy like it was his last meal. At that time I knew it was wrong but hell I didn't give a shit. With David’s hand over my mouth it made the sex more intense and I didn't want to stop. He pushed his big juicy dick inside my tight wet pussy, and fucked me until I came all over him. I haven't been fucked that good in a very long time. My man is one of those get in it and pound brothers, he's usually done in 10 minutes and ready to go to sleep.

Time got past us and my phone was ringing because I was ten minutes late. Shit I said "Damn I don’t want you to stop"....he looked at me pushed my face into the pillow and said "Fuck them we get there when we get there." Oh my God it felt so damn good to fuck my frustrations away and now I was back in a damn good mode. David asked me if I was still getting married, and I told him of course all that your boy doesn’t know won’t kill him. I did finally get down the aisle and married the man I love. He did me wrong the day of our wedding and I have been getting my revenge every since. Well time for me to go meet David and get my back blown out “LIKE I SAID WHAT HE DON’T KNOW WONT KILL HIM” I know you guys are saying I should tell him I saw him and be honest about all I am doing now but why tell something you getting away with. I am a very smart lady, I ran away from the room that night but not before I snapped a couple of shots. So when he finds out about me and his friend, I got the bomb to drop on him also. Always staying one step ahead.

SIGNED A VENGEFUL WIFE

Rules of the game called SEX

Rules: Like any game two people play their is a winner and a loser, hell sometimes its even a tie. But in the game of sex their is only one winner and one worn out loser. To play the game you must be physically fit and ready to through down. No holds bar, anything goes, and falls count anywhere. Playing this game you must know all the tricks, all the moves. You get scored on level of difficulty, and creativeness. You can play this game with one other other or with multiple players how ever you see fit to play the game. Each player can bring props into the sexual game. Vibrators, sex pillows, oils, sexy clothes, etc....whatever you may need to get the upper hand. Sex is a big part of a relationship and if someone tells you it's not they are lying, or they are a virgin. The game can be interrupted by pirates. Pirates are people who steal what you got, and leave you with nothing to show for it. In order to fight these Pirates you must fuck your girl or your man to the point of no return. Fuck your partner so damn good they wont even think about another person. If you are not fucking your partner Pirates will take your dick or your pussy right away from you and by time you realize what happened its two late.

There are different levels to this game you have one night stand, you have regulars, and life time partners. Regular and life time are the ones who needs to watch out for the Pirates, one night stand just protect yourself no ones judging you and if they are tell them to go to hell it's not like they never had one before.

The biggest rule of the game is to LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN....I can't stress that enough. Listen to who you are with and look at that persons body language. Fellas you can tell if you women is faking it but you guys don't ever pay attention that's why we've gotten away with it for so long. She can be moaning and screaming like you killing her, but if her body not shaking and moving you need to look into that. Fellas and Ladies its more then 3-5 sexual positions out their. Get you a book and look up some new shit to bring to your bedroom, don't be ashamed of what you do, who's going to know if you keep it between you and him. (Advice from author: Every time I get ready to have sex I do something new, weather its a new position, or a new outfit, and the man I got ant going anywhere..) Ladies be confidant about yours, weather your big, small, big ass, little ass, big titties, little titties who gives a damn. Work with what God gave you and he wont go anywhere. That goes for the fellas to. I didn't forget about you guys not at all..

 Fellas: Fellas don't brag on your dick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I don't care how big it is this is 2012 let it speak for itself. Don't brag on your pussy eating skills, let it speak for itself. Guys only send pics of your dick to a women you are trying to be with for the long run. Pictures will end up on some website with your shit photo shopped looking like you got more balls then dick. Guys if your girl don't want to try a new position then you try the new position. Get your game plan right before you step into the game.

Foreplay: Foreplay is a form of sexual activities to get you and your partner in the mood. Foreplay can be done in various different ways. You can do together in the bed or wherever you decide to have sex. Or you can  play over text message, Tango, Skype, etc. FYI...Before you guys think I am slut I have one man I am with..so I am just blogging some tips to keep your man home. I used to be one of the Pirates so you are getting some first hand info here. Dress up is a part of foreplay, put on a sexy wig and outfit on and pretend to be someone else. I have noticed a lot of men love to be dominated, told what to do. Work with that ladies and I am telling you he will fall in love. It might be strange for him at first but he will get used to calling you mistress, and you spanking him.

Final Instruction: Make the game FUN...sex shouldn't be work. If you are not having fun then don't waste your time life is to short and having a boring sex life along with everything else in the world is outrageous.

SIGNED: LETS PLAY THE GAME

Like father like son

 Sarah was in her mid 30's and her husband was in his mid 20's. To the outside world they looked like a normal couple. Sarah was a loving wife but at one point in time she was the biggest hoe out there. Alonzo thought he could change her and make her more respectful, and for a little while that did work. Alonzo was a fine tall light skinned man, he was the total package. He worked, he had his shit together and he could work it in the bedroom. Sarah had no complaints when it came to the dick action from this man. He would send her mind to places she had never been before.
One day Ronald came by, that's Alonzo's father. Now Ronald had been over plenty of times before talking with his son, and hanging out. On this particular hot summer night Sarah was home alone and she was walking around the house waiting on her man to come home. She had his favorite pink stilettos with a pink and black set. The house was only lite by candle light and you could smell a sweet flower smell in the air. As she was getting the house ready she heard the door opening and she just knew her man was home. Time to give him the loving he deserves after a hard day at work. With the candle going up the stair case heading to the bedroom he had no problem in finding what awaited him. As she lay on the bed with her ass in the air just waiting on him to take what he has been dreaming for while at work. She feels this strong hand on her ass rubbing her body. She felt him pull her hair and put his hands under her neck. She couldn't see him because she had a blind fold on. This was his fantasy and she was fulfilling it. He licked her hot body from the base of her neck all the way to the top of her ass. He wanted to taste more, he had her lift up and sit on his face. Sarah was shocked because Alonzo had never done that before, she was thinking this man is all about his tonight. Sarah couldn't control herself and ended up climaxing in his mouth. She wanted more and he gave her more. He pushed his thick dick inside of her tight and ready pussy. OHHHHH MYYYYY GODDDDD she screamed. She called out his name Alonzo what are you doing to me...The voice replied "I have been wanting this pussy for a very long time.
Sarah knew that voice and she knew that wasn't her husband. She snatched off the blindfold to see it was Ronald pleasing her like she had never been pleased before. She didn't know how to feel but she asked him to stop. He kept hitting that spot and STOP turned into DON'T STOP DON'T STOP...At that time Ronald knew he had her, he knew he could fuck her to sleep. He was giving her the best dick she had ever had, and he knew it. Whispering in her ear saying "I know you love my son, but I know he don't fuck and eat that pussy like it's supposed to be. That's what I am here for."
When Alonzo finally came home and saw how Sarah had the house ready for him, he knew  he was late and he knew he had to make it up to her. When he got upstairs she was laying in the bed fast asleep. He hoped in the shower, then proceeded to eat his wife's pussy. As he started to get into it she was  waking up moaning and said "OH MY GOD THAT FEELS SO GOOD...RONALD DIDN'T YOU GET ENOUGH EARLIER".

Signed
Can't turn a hoe into a housewife.

College Life

While I was in high school I lead the perfect life. Both parents, nice house, played sports, and I was very popular. But I was sheltered I had one boyfriend my whole life and we were going to be hours away from each other now that Iam in college and he's back home. First couple of months it was ok, we saw each other on weekends, holidays, and Skye. But after the first semester I started to realize I needed more, my body was calling out to be touched and he wasn't here to touch it. But I said to myself I wasn't going to hurt him so I stayed true to myself. Halloween night there was a Halloween party on campus, and of course me and my friends went to this party. I was dressed up like a naughty nurse. I had on the white leather dress, the fish net stockings, and the white leather boots with the hat to match. I was looking so good I could of fucked myself. While at the party I saw Tavone, this guy is in three of my classes and all I have been thinking about is how would it feel to have him fuck me. I have heard stories from girls in my dorm about how Tavone gets down. These girls say he fucks you gangster style. Now I have never heard of gangster style until I came here. Apparently gangster style is when the guy is really rough, like pulling your hair ripping your clothes off. fucking you all hard, and calling you a bitch or a hoe. I have never had sex like that before. My boyfriend and I had three positions: missionary, me riding him, and him hitting it from the back. Not saying sex with my boyfriend was boning but hey it could of been way better.

Sometimes Tavone sits next to me in class and all I want to say is fuck me right here on this table, can you make me your little bitch. When I saw him at the party dressed like Dracula I just wanted him to bite my neck, my nipples, and my pussy. Just nibble all over me. I guess my friends could tell something was wrong with me, because they rushed me to the bathroom saying put water on your face you are staring out to space. I broke down and told my girlfriend's what I wanted to do with Tavone, not caring that two of them have fucked him already I didn't care this is college. I told my friends I am going to fuck him in this bathroom and I want you guys to watch me get fucked. At first they were like what the hell, but then they said why the hell not. So my fiends hid in the handicap stall while I went to claim my prize. I went up to him and whispered in his ear "Look Tavone I want to see if all the talk in my dorm is true, I want you to fuck me in that bathroom. Only once." He looked at me and before he could say anything I took his hand and put it under my dress so he could see how wet and tight my pussy was. He didn't waste no time following me in the bathroom. As soon as we got in the bathroom it was on. I asked him to keep his costume on and lets role play. He pretend to be Dracula catching the helpless nurse. He caught me alright and when he caught me, he bit my neck, then my nipples, and then my pussy. Just like I dreamed he would. Tavone was living up to his reputation. He picked me up and put me in the reverse 69. I had never done a 69 position where we were both standing up. He eat my pussy like he was hungry for days and I sucked his dick like my life depended on it. I had climaxed 4 times from him eating my pussy. I wanted the dick so bad, and he gave me what I wanted. He had my ass bent over sinks, up against the wall. Pushing my face and titties up against the cold tile. This man was blowing my fucking mind. In my ear he saying "You wanted to find out what I was all about now you got it so take it and shut the fuck up." OHHHHH MYYYYY GOOOOOD is all I could say. I hopped on top of him and rode him front ways and backwards, but that only turned him up more. While I was riding him backwards he sat up gabbed my nipples pushed me forwards, stuck his finger in my ass and started fucking me doggy. This man never missed a beat. While getting fucked from the back I looked over in the stall where my girlfriends were at and these chicks were all playing with their pussy and licking on each other. That shit turned me on even more. To see these girls cumming with me just blew my fucking mind, and the fact he didn't know they were watching.
Tavone wore me out and my pussy was so sore, but I didn't give a shit. I was on cloud 9, 10, and 11. After we were done he looked at me and said "Tavone got another mouth peace." I looked at him and smiled. Got my clothes back on, went to the bathroom stall where these chicks were at and we just started laughing. We got our selves together went back to the party to have a great night. After that night Tavones reputation was out there for every girl to see, because what he didn't know was my friends were in the stall video taking the whole thing. So whenever a girl wanted to know about Tavone'swww.TavonesperformancePhotoshop is the best program out there.


SIGNED COLLEGE PRANK

The Cougar

People I am a cougar...I am 44 and I like men who are in there 20's. Call me what you want but call me a hot sexy women in her prime. I consider myself a cougar not only because I date me half my age but because I pounce when I see  man I want. Now I don't give a shit if he has a wife, or a girlfriend. All I care about is my pussy being worked over. Ladies don't hate on me because I am taking your man, I am willing to do what you young chicks aren't willing to do. I listen to him, I take control, I give him what he needs and wants. That's what's wrong with young women today they don't take control. They have to many excuse. I make a young man feel like he owns this pussy and I own his dick. This is 2012 ladies if you are not sucking your man's dick, I am...If you are not letting your man fuck you in your ass I am. If you wont give your man his fantasy oh honey I will. Call me a freak but you will be calling me a freak while your man's face is buried in this cougars pussy.

Cougar stands for a women in her prime who only dates younger men. That's what I am....I went to the club not that far from my house with my hair down my red short dress and no panties. I wanted the men to be able to sense that my pussy was in need. Man it didn't take anytime for them to be able to tell what I was there for. I was only there for 1hour and the men where loving me. Of course every club has bitches hating. But hate on bitches you don't have what I got between my legs...which is open season. Men see me and they know, what they see is what they are going to get, no cut cards. These men see experience not lack of. I found the right one he was tall handsome and I could tell he had a horse dick in them pants. That's all I needed to see and it was time to pounce. This man came up to me introducing himself as Michael. I didn't even hear his name all I could think of was fuck your name I want you to fuck me. I guess he could tell I really didn't give a shit what his name was I just wanted him to cease the throbbing between my legs with that monster of his. We went to the dance floor and as soon as he touched me he could tell I wasn't wearing any panties, and I could feel all that man hood up against me. The club was super packed so no one was paying us any attention. I dropped down to my knees and pulled his dick out just enough to lick the head of it letting him know I meant business. He bends me over pushes my dress up and slides his dick inside of my wet and waiting pussy. I screamed but the music was so loud no one paid attention. After that tease on the dance floor I was like fuck it lets go to my car. It's a good thing my top goes down because this big and tall man was long stroking the shit out of this pussy. This cougar pussy was dripping wet all over my back seat. I don't usually swallow on the first time but Michael made me feel a certain way no young man had ever made me feel. He was about to climax and I couldn't help myself I had to see what this man tasted like. It was the best thing I had ever tasted. 5 years have passed since then I am 49 and he is 30, and we have been happy together every since. This cougar has finally been tamed into a wife, but old ways die hard. I still get down but only with my man. Ladies age is nothing but a number, but having a man work your pussy over so that is all you can think about the next day is the thing.


SIGN: A SEXY COUGAR

Its all about you

Most times when me and my man are having sex its all about me. I figured this time around it would be all about him. I knew he would be home around 10 from work so I had plenty of time to get my man trap together. First I made his favorite meal, then his favorite dessert red velvet cake. I also cut up fresh fruits for him. I went into the bed room where I carefully laid red and white roses all over the bed. I ran my man a hot bubble bath with roses inside the tub. I put on his favorite perfume so I could smell so enticing. I heard the car pull up and I was just finishing up the last couple of things. This night is all about him. I put a note on the front door that said "Go to the Dining Room". He went to the dining room where he eat all his dinner, under the food was another message written beside the plate that said "Go to our bathroom"...In the bathroom it was a message written on the bottle of  wine that said "Get completely naked open this bottle of wine and get ready for your bath. As he climbed in the tub I came up behind with with just a rob on. I had him lay his head back as I washed every inch of my man. I washed him like he had never been washed before. I poured wine on his chest and drank it off. I could tell he was loving it because his dick was rock hard. He wanted to fuck me so bad but I wasn't done with him by far.
After I dried him off and pulled him close to me and teased him by licking on his chest his back hell I even gave him a couple seconds of head. Just to get him good and ready. I walked him to the bedroom were it was time for dessert. I blindfolded him so I could set up the desert. I laid myself on the bed placing red velvet cake on my pussy, putting whip cream and strawberries on my nipples and stomach. Time to take the blindfold off baby and eat your dessert. He was so shocked. He started licking my nipples, the my stomach. Now time for the cake he eat my pussy and this cake at the same damn time. He didn't bite me once but I didn't give a fuck if he did. This night was all about him. After he eat had dessert it was time for me to show him how I get down. I grabbed the candle and poured wax on his chest and told his ass don't move. My man likes that rough shit. As I was riding him backwards the door opened and who was standing in the door. Yes another women. I was making my mans whole fantasy come true I was riding his dick and this women came in ready to go. I moved off his dick and sat on my mans face then we were both sucking his dick at the same time. He didn't know what to do all he could do was shake and say baby I love you. I said  I love you to and this night is all about you. We did the whole threesome thing. She eat my pussy just as good as she sucked his dick. He fucked her but not as good as he fucks me. By the end of the night my man was beyond satisfied. This is a one time thing but the night was made to be all about him.

Stay At Home Mom

I have been a stay at home mom for almost a year now. My husband is a stock broker and our son is 10 months old. I love staying at home with our son but I miss having fun. Marcus used to come home and we would fuck for hours now he comes home and all he wants is a hot meal and a nap. I have done everything but put my pussy on his face and say eat me. One particular morning I was feeling hot and horny and the feeling just wouldn't go away. So I put our son to sleep in the other room and started pleasing myself. Thinking about how Marcus dick felt inside of me and how his hands felt all over my body. As I was just about to climax their was a knock at the door, I tired to ignore it but who ever it was; just wouldn't stop banging. Shit "What do you want"!!! I swung the door open and it was our mail man with a certified letter for me to sign. He must of been able to tell I was in the middle of pleasuring myself because he was looking at me as if to say " I know what you where doing in here". Although I loved my husband the mail man was looking so damn hot. He was sweating from walking up and down the street all day. I invited him in for some ice water. We have lived here for 3 years and he has never been inside the house. This fine black man must of had a sixth since because he knew I was checking him out. I had on a wife beater and some boy shorts with my ass hanging out the bottom and no bra. I knew he wanted it, but it was up to who would make the first move. I looked at the clock and said fuck it the baby wont be up for another hour or so and my husband wont be home until 5. I pulled him close to me and I could feel his hard dick pressing up against his shorts. This man wanted me just as much as I wanted him. I have been wondering for months what his dick might taste like. I wasted no time finding out. All I could think of was wow this man can deliver dick to me all day everyday. He wasted no time picking me up and taking my pussy on the counter top in the kitchen. Oh SHIT is all I could say while my juices flowed down his throat. My body needed this kind of fuck, Marcus hadn't fucked me in this kitchen since before I got pregnant. Fuck me Fuck me I screamed I tried to be quite so I wouldn't wake the baby. But I couldn't help it I had to let that go its been a long time coming. This mail man has dick for days and everyday at the same time since that day he comes over and delivers. I know I shouldn't cheat on my husband but hey my body needs things, and now I love being a STAY AT HOME MOM...

Friends with Benfits

He's a friend but he makes my body so hot if someone was to touch me they would swear I was sick. To think of how long its been since this has started. Being secrets lovers, playing the down low game man we are just to much. I see you with your girl you see me with my man but in the back of our heads all we can think about is each other. Going on double dates and our partners not having the slights clue that we are fucking like no other. She doesn't understand you and he doesn't understand me. She doesn't please you and he doesn't please me. But we are stuck, we are both thrill seekers so we play the friend game in public and the get it down game in private. It's so hard to deal with you coming over with her and my pussy is throbbing saying fuck her take me now. I am so hot I have to rub ice on my body to cool myself down. But it's not working the ice has me thinking about how you lick every inch of my body leaving no space left untouched. We are sitting at the table play cards you, your girl, my man, and myself. I get to the point I am like fuck it I need to go to the bathroom. I give you that eye and you follow. These two are sitting at the table with no clue, I pull you in the bathroom and its on. I get on my knees and take all of you in my mouth I just couldn't wait anymore. You bend me over the sink and taste me from the back with your fingers in my ass. You put your swollen dick inside of my tight wet pussy and fuck the shit out of me in this bathroom. Mind you our partners are in the other room with no clue we are fucking in this bathroom. Although it was just a quickie it satisfied me. I sat back in my chair finished my card game gave my man some when you guys left. I look over at the clock at see its 7am my man is leaving for work, I kiss him by. The door bell rings, and we all know who it was...Friend with Benefits

Good Morning

Hey everyone I took the day off yesterday because I was up all night...Not doing what you think I was just up all Monday night. I haven't pulled an all night er in a very long time. I talked to my lawyer yesterday about my landlord and his high fees that he's not supposed to be charging. So that is coming out pretty good for me. I just can't wait to move and get out of my financial bind. My truck has really put me behind and I hate it but I have to do what I have to do. I only have to fight this battle for a couple more months then life should go back to some kind of normalcy. I am not going to sit here and cry or worry myself to death about all the bad things going on in my life. I am focus on the good things going on. I am healthy, I have a roof over my head. You know we all take the little things for granted but when they are gone we really notice them. My AC is acting crazy because I have to tilt it out my window but I need another set of hands to do that. But it will get done this week. The past couple of weeks I have realized you can't change other people and you can only change yourself. You can't worry about how others are going to help you but how you are going to help yourself. These past couple weeks have opened my eyes and showed me I can only depend on me and only me to get all my goals met and that's why I have decided to go get my PH.D..I know I have been saying I am doing this or that for my kids and my family.This degree is for me and only me. Call me selfish but this is one of my personal goals. Well time to feed my kids breakfast and get some work done TTYL

GM

Good morning everyone I hope every ones weekend was pleasant. My weekend was ok nothing to brag about because of course we all know I didn't go anywhere. It sucks to when your vehicle is down during the summer times. The kids are out of school so you can just imagine the headaches I am have until I get my truck back to take them out and about. I had a really great night last night. It felt good to just let go and enjoy the moment. All I am saying is DAMN.....Ladies word of advice give your man a week to himself and you take a week to yourself and when you finally get back together it will be like the 4th of July. LOL Let me stop. It is so early and I have the slightest clue why I am up. Yea I do my oldest son woke me up. Whats funny is this boy can get up at 6:30AM when there is no school but when he has school I have to pull covers off him and damn near throw water on him to get him up. Well this week hopefully will be smooth and go by fast. Cant wait for next month all will be back to normal. Truck will be out the shop, kids will be going down the E.S with my mom and my sister for a couple of days. Which gives me time to play. I am still looking to move this year I just can't stand living here another year, I see myself going off on somebody elses child so. I am searching for a new townhouse, I feel its the best. Well time for me to go back to bed...Have a Blessed Monday. TTYL

My daily reading

Card 1 (The Sun) : How you feel about yourself now »

You are feeling abundant happy and joyful - if you don't, be assured that you are about to enter a period of success and fulfillment. This is a time of pleasure, vitality and good health, travel and holidays to be enjoyed. Good news around children or the conception or birth of a longed-for baby. The Sun heralds an ending to difficulties and a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones.

Card 2 (Death) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is absolute change, to end what you no longer want and start anew. You desire to transform your career or your love life, perhaps your whole lifestyle in general. However catastrophic such changes could be, embracing them will only make you grow in wisdom and experience.

Card 3 (Judgement) : Your fears »

You are afraid that the conclusions you've been wanting are delayed and fear any far-reaching changes ahead. Perhaps things aren't turning out quite as you expected for some reason - this is a period when your routine will be changed dramatically. Fear not, although events will seem to be moving at a real pace, any choice you make will change life for the better. If you are worried about any legal issues chances are they will be ruled in your favour.

Card 4 (The Moon) : What is going for you »

Despite the fear and bewilderment you feel, and the seeming difficulty of the path you have chosen, keep going - all will eventually turn out fine. The Moon is a good omen if you are in a clandestine affair; it also shows us how to be open to new and unexpected possibilities.

Card 5 (The Star) : What is going against you »

This is a period of tension and frustrations, you feel pessimistic and fearful that your hopes will be dashed. Any bad luck you may be having is primarily down to your self-doubt and negativity. Have faith that your luck will change.

Card 6 (The Hierophant) : Outcome »

Help is at hand. If you want wise counsel and moral guidance put your trust in someone you have a lot of respect for. Don't allow others to influence you too much with what they want you to conform to, be true to yourself. When considering your options go with tried and tested traditional values, rather than the unconventional novel approach. For example marriage is more likely to be your desire than a living together situation.

OMG Bored.com

I am beyond bored right now. I know I only blog when I am bored and I am trying to stay out of trouble. I noticed earlier this week when I am bored I get into trouble LOL...I never thought I would miss the gym this much I am still working out and watching what I eat while I am at home but I just miss the escape of the gym. I know as soon as I get my truck they gym will be where I will be at with my kids. I also miss going when I want to and not having to wait on other people to take me anywhere. To be real with you the only reason I am blogging is because I don't have anywhere to go and my truck is in the shop. But come next month this blog will be bare once again. Especially when I am out enjoying my summer and not having a bunch of demands on my life. After looking at my reading I see they all have the hermant card, basically saying this is my time to set still and we all no me and sitting still don't go in the same sentence but I am going to relax and collect my thoughts. I have also seen the lovers card in a couple of my readings. I am so not paying that card any attention right now. I could care less about relationships. I just want to go LOL I just want to put the kids in the truck and drive to the beach eat some crabs and some boardwalk fries. Go play some games and let them build sand castles while I just relax with a good book. But in due time due time Well time for me to collect my thoughts like the cards say, and believe in my choices. TTYL

Today's Reading

Card 1 (The Hierophant) : How you feel about yourself now »

You feel a need for advice or wise council or perhaps spiritual consolation. Someone, or perhaps immediate events, will provide moral and practical guidance. Perhaps you are considering being such a tutor, counsellor or spiritual advisor? You desire the tried and tested traditional values, so when considering your options, this approach will prove wiser than adopting an unconventional novel approach. For example, marriage is more likely to be your desire than a living together situation.

Card 2 (The Hanged Man) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to have it all, why should you have to give something or someone up? Perhaps you feel a victim and that events are not going as planned. Trust that this is a passage from one phase of your life to another. If you are not sure what or who you need to give up, trust that what will be will be, and will ultimately be to your benefit.

Card 3 (Wheel Of Fortune) : Your fears »

You are in fear of everything turning for the worse for you, perhaps you are experiencing a run of bad luck. You have to trust that most of what we fear never happens and as The Wheel of Fortune turns downwards against you, the wheel will naturally turn upwards again and bring good fortune to you too. This difficult phase will pass.

Card 4 (The Lovers) : What is going for you »

New love and commitment will enter your life, even if there's no one on the horizon - be prepared for a surprise. Throw caution to the wind and expect joyous and happy times ahead.

Card 5 (The Magician) : What is going against you »

Someone, most likely male, isn't quite what they seem. Trickery and deception cleverly disguised as charm and friendliness, so be sure that this person really does have your best interests at heart. If someone who you feel wary of is presenting you with a business opportunity, be cautious and trust your instincts.

Card 6 (The Hermit) : Outcome »

This is a time for you to be alone or may herald a time of loneliness. Take this time for quiet introspection and rest. Don't worry you will find the answers, but the Hermit signals a warning not to make hasty decisions. If you have been unwell this is a time for rest and recuperation.

GM

Good morning everyone. Today is one of those days where I really miss my truck...If I had my truck I would of went home last night and the kids last day would of been yesterday instead of today. This week hasn't been that bad, it's been pretty good. I am just hoping these next couple of weeks fly by so I can get my truck out the body shop and be able to do things for myself. I really hate depending on other people not because they don't help me but because I am very much independent. I am still waiting on this email and it's driving me crazy. My friends say stop waiting for it and it will come when it comes. We all know that's easier said then done. Right now I wish I was in the ATL for Greek week. Having a blast with all my peoples and just relaxing but I will go next year if I can. I don't know if I said this in my previous blogs I have decided to go get my PH.D in criminology at University of Maryland College Park next fall. I am so ready for my career to take off and then I can leave all the bullshit in the past. I also cant wait until August. We are hitting Bush Gardens, Kings Dominion, and Six Flags. I am going to have a blast this summer and I will not be sitting in this house looking crazy. I am thinking about going to stay with my mom for a week or two just to get away from all the mess up here. Plus I am moving in the next couple of months to another house. I have had it here....between my Landlord not wanting to fix shit and his high ass rent plus late fees and these kids out here that I cant stand I have got to get the hell out of here. I think this whole house is going to be empty by Christmas. I am trying to get out of here by September October, I hate moving but I got to do what I got to do. Well time for me to get these kids out of here for their last day of school and for me to get 4 hours of peace and quiet. TTYL Kiss Kiss

Daily reading

Card 1 (The Star) : How you feel about yourself now »

You feel there is hope, or if you don't, have faith - a tranquil period is imminent. If you have been ill, suffered bereavement or disappointment in love, take heart, good fortune is on its way. New horizons are indicated and you will feel a new zest for life. This is your wish card - if considering a new love affair, new job or career, or travel, then go for it. You may also receive a gift or gifts!

Card 2 (The Hermit) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to know what to do, as well as companionship or a lover as you feel somewhat lonely or isolated at the moment. Perhaps you are feeling exhausted and in need of a rest - if you have been ill this is a time for rest and recuperation.

Card 3 (The Devil) : Your fears »

You are afraid that it's out of control, you simply cannot resist this passionate attraction. Despite the fact its addictive and unlikely to be right, you just can't stop yourself. Whatever it is, a passion for someone who's not good for you, money deals that are too good to be true or any other kind of temptation, try to resist, as it is unlikely to have a positive outcome. If you're feeling low in self-belief and self worth and doubt your abilities, don't, have more confidence - its not too late to change direction.

Card 4 (Temperance) : What is going for you »

You are about to enter a period of peace and harmony in your relationship, career or life generally. You will find a way of handling difficult circumstances with calm confidence. Life is flowing at this time enjoy it.

Card 5 (The Fool) : What is going against you »
This is your Personal Court Card ( - what's this? - )

Beware of impetuous and impulsive decisions, they could cost you dear. Draw on your knowledge and experience, perhaps there are naive and immature beliefs behind your current desires. Are you looking to move onwards and upwards or run away? Look before you leap, you don't want to appear the fool do you?

Card 6 (The Moon) : Outcome »

Whilst you are confused and fearful and allowing your anxieties to hold you back, trust that all will turn out well in the end. Things may seem tough or confusing but stick with it, its right for you. The Moon is a good omen if you are in a clandestine affair and helps guide us to open our minds to new and unexpected possibilities.

* N.B. You must click the button. Using your 'enter' key will NOT work! *

Havent done this in awhile "My daily reading"

Card 1 (The Sun) : How you feel about yourself now »

You are feeling abundant happy and joyful - if you don't, be assured that you are about to enter a period of success and fulfillment. This is a time of pleasure, vitality and good health, travel and holidays to be enjoyed. Good news around children or the conception or birth of a longed-for baby. The Sun heralds an ending to difficulties and a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones.

Card 2 (The Hanged Man) : What you most want at this moment »

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is to have it all, why should you have to give something or someone up? Perhaps you feel a victim and that events are not going as planned. Trust that this is a passage from one phase of your life to another. If you are not sure what or who you need to give up, trust that what will be will be, and will ultimately be to your benefit.

Card 3 (The Lovers) : Your fears »

Ones heart is ruling ones head! You are so afraid of being hurt you are paralysed into non-action. To have or not to have? To stay or to go? Throw caution to the wind, great happiness awaits you if you can trust what you feel and ignore the fear and do it anyway.

Card 4 (The Star) : What is going for you »

A wish come true, this is a time of good luck and fortune, perhaps after a period of struggle and heartache. Good health, possibly after a time of illness, and good fortune that will give you a new zest of life. If considering a new love affair, new job or career, or travel, then go for it. You may also receive a gift or gifts!

Card 5 (The High Priestess) : What is going against you »

Insecurity is a devil that taunts us but only if we listen to that 'doubting Thomas' we all have in our heads. Ignore it. What do your instincts tell you? Perhaps you don't like what they say? Well you could always go against your instincts, but we all know what that leads to don't we!

Card 6 (The Hermit) : Outcome »

This is a time for you to be alone or may herald a time of loneliness. Take this time for quiet introspection and rest. Don't worry you will find the answers, but the Hermit signals a warning not to make hasty decisions. If you have been unwell this is a time for rest and recuperation.

Men got it made

Men have it made when it comes to relationships. There are several women out there screaming "There are no good men out there", well if you don't challenge them to be good men then you will never find one. Women don't have any standards anymore, they talk about the 90 day rule but they give it up in 10 days or the same day. You can't expect to get respect from any man treating yourself like a drive thru window. We as women have to upgrade our standards then the men will see we are not settling for the crap. I am not saying go out here and take a man for all he's worth...NO...You want a man that treats you like you are his equal show him you are independent that you can survive without him and he will look at you in a whole different light. Another thing "A MAN WILL AND CAN ONLY DO WHAT  YOU LET HIM DO, AND HE WILL ONLY RESPECT YOU AS MUCH AS YOU RESPECT YOURSELF".If you have no respect for yourself then he will treat you like the trick you are. Relationships are 25% honesty, 25% patience, 25% friendship, and 25% love....Some say why you put friendship in the percentage. I have learned you have to be friends with your man or women, no one wants to be with someone they don't like. In reality your friendship has to be stronger then all the other parts. Two people share a special bond no matter what happened in their relationships if they can fall back on friendship they can make it work.

But back to the main point of this blog.....Ladies stop saying there are no good men out here. Sit down and think of what your standards are and what you want your man to have or whatever. Go from that draw from what you want and stay true to yourself. Remember men are going to mirror who you are. What I mean by that, if you put up with your man cheating on you then he will do it again, especially if you don't have any consequences for him. If you want to get married ladies don't stay with a man for half your life wondering why he hasn't asked you to marry him. When you haven't forced this mans hand. That's why I said men have it easy, some women will put up with the dumbest crap to say they are in a relationship and post it on their Facebook page. But why do that when you are not happy with what you have at home. The man you have might be the man for you and he might be a good man, if you make him be. Men are like children they are going to try to get away with whatever they can. You tell a child don't touch the stove because its hot. You tell your man the same shit "Don't mess around on me or you will be out on your ass" and mean it. He will think twice if he loves you. If he don't love you then hey brush yourself off and try another. Well time for me to see whats cracking up in here...and maybe take my own advice and see where my prince charming is....LOL Good night peoples TTYL  Kiss Kiss

I dont know

The reason I titled this blog I dont know is because I dont have the slightest clue on how I feel about certain things happening in my life right now. Right now I am waiting on my career to take off and I don't want to go back to school for my PH.D but if I have to then that's what I will do. As for my personal life I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I feel letting go of my past and moving on from all the crap that happened last year is really helping me grow. But in a way I can admit somethings have changed in my life that have taken me to the point of no return. It's sad but when its done its done. I can't spend my life looking backwards anymore. I can't sit in my bed and cry myself to sleep and be up all night pounding my head about if I am making the right decision for myself. All I have ever asked is to be happy and for a long time I haven't been happy. I can honestly say I tired but I know where my heart is and where it is not. I will always love him but I can't go into working it out mode when I have feelings for another man. I don't know what to do, this is when life is really sticky and crazy. I just need a vacation and a couple of months go by then maybe my mind will be clear. Well got to go back to class. TTYL

Womens breaking point

Every women has her own breaking point when it comes to relationships. Some women dont stand for cheating, some dont stand for lying and some dont stand for financial security. But whatever her breaking point is its here's to have. I have been pushed to the point some would think it was the breaking point in my previous relationships. But hey I might not of been ready. I sit and think about a good friend of mines who I thought was at her breaking point but hey she's not and as her friend I can only respect that. When a man hurts a women she can do one of two things ( Stay with the man and work it out, or leave and move on with her life). I have done both in my life time and I am telling you neither one is easier then the other. Staying just makes everything that man does look suspect and moving on just means its another failed relationship under your belt. When a women is fed up she knows, no matter what anyone else may say to that women when she is tired she is tired. Women are in abusive relationships everyday, you have plenty of people who say "Why is she with him, I would leave, she's crazy", but in reality she's just not tired of getting treated like a punching bag. I stayed in certain relationships that I knew were toxic only because I wasn't ready to leave. But when I was ready to go I left. I have met my breaking point time after time and I will continue to walk down the road with my head held high and not care what others have to say, because this women knows her breaking point and she will not stand for a lying, cheating, no good man.
One day I will find the right man for me, I will settle down and be able to say he loves me for me and not for what I can do for him, or where I can get him in life. I will not be a booty call or a friend with benefits I will be a loving wife, mother, and friend. But please believe I will always stay true to myself and my breaking point. TTYL

A new start

Today I sat back and thought about where my life is headed and where I want it to go. I have made myself some serious long terms goals. I plan on buying my first house in 2014 and I plan on being settled down by then in a strong healthy relationship. I have also decided to further my education and get my PH.D in Criminology and my first choice school is University of Maryland College Park. While thinking about my life I realized I have to stop this back and forth game between these two men. It's really getting old and one is trying to put demands on me about the other and I really dont have time for it. But I will say both of these guys are there for me when I need them to be, but one is only there when it benefits us working out. Not saying he don't care about me, but if we dont have any shot at working on anything I am left high and dry. But not the other one, we can have a disagreement and thats all it is a disagreement. 10 mins later we are cracking up about something else. I am very big on loyalty and trust. Right now I am going through a hard time and its funny you see people for who they are when you are going through your hard times. You see the goodness as well as the ugly. When I need something I don't have to ask one of them to do anything he just knows I need help and if he can do it he's there for me no matter what personal choices I have made. That's all I ask from all my friends let me make my own choices but if you don't agree with them hey its my life. I will still be cool with you if you don't agree with my choices I just don't want anyone in my corner who's only there if I do what they want me to do. I am just not that type of person when it comes to my personal life.

I have my kids to think about, but I also have myself to think about. I know my kids want me to be happy but I have to ask myself who am I more happier with. Who makes me smile, who's there for me, and who do I think will always be there for me. But not only me who can be there for my kids as well. I am a package deal I don't want my kids to be happy and I am miserable or I am happy and my kids are miserable. We all have to be happy or nothing will work. I am not settling anymore, I want it all and if one man cant give it to me then their are plenty others out there. That's how I am looking at it from now on. Well time for me to get somethings done TTYL

TGIF...My coming of age

Thank God It's Friday....Well last night I had a really relaxing night. No drama only laughs and it made me realize this next month will be a year when everything in my life turned up side down. I believe its time for me to forgive and move on. The whole thing is like beating a dead horse. I am really taking this time out from relationships to work on me and I know some people cant respect that but hey its my decision. I can honestly say I am ready to move on from all this past summer drama and earlier this year drama. I am ready to start my rebuilding process, now I don't know where it might take me or what might happen I just know all the crap that happened last year and earlier this year is out of my life. I am done with that drama and I don't need it in my life. In order for me to move on and be happy I have to let all that go, now I am a stubborn person but I have to protect my heart and my kids that's the number one thing to me. But I realized everyone has moved on from it but me, and I think the pain and the embarrassment kept me from moving on. Everyone has been telling me to move on Myeika move on....But no one was dealing with it but me. Now I am ready to move on for myself. I am really over it the whole thing. I am over all the lies the cheating the drama the back and forth. I can't live my life fighting a up hill losing battle. Well time for me to enjoy my weekend this  is the first weekend in a long time that I am not dealing with drama and I feel free. I haven't felt this way since graduation and that was 2010. I am ready to get that old me back and leave this bitter, mean, person behind. But don't get it twisted I am not about to let no one get over on me again. Love and live your life but learn your lessons. TTYL

Hey peoples

Well looks like my summer is going to start off boring. One of my goals was to have a full time regular job by now and have my kids in daycare. But that goal didn't happen and it's not because I haven't tried either. But oh well life goes on I am not I repeat not going to be sitting in this house this summer like I did last summer pondering on what I should and shouldn't have done. This summer I will have my truck back by June 29th, and I cant wait for that. I hopefully will be invited to the FBI Interview process and then where ever God sees for me to go thats where I am going. For my 30th I don't want anything real big, I think I am just going to go away for a week. Maybe Hollywood, San Francisco, or a Mexican Cruise. I am not going to sit around here and worry about how I am going to get any money for anything. I am just going to live my life. I noticed when I stop trying to make things happen they happen on their own so that's my new motto. I do know one thing I am planning on going to the beach for the 4th of July weekend. Iam spend some time with my mom for her bday and then I am going to hang with my girls and maybe somebody might pop up and see how we party on the E.S. He keep saying he wants to go to the beach so who knows the balls in his court we welcome all new comers. You know one thing if feels good to have a friend that I can count on. My truck is fixed right now but I don't have the 750 to pay my duct able and I wont have it until the 29th. But he honestly said  he would take me to handle grocery shopping or anything else I needed, and he's taking me to get my truck when its fixed. To me sex aside that's a real friend. He's not expecting nothing or laying demands on me, saying if I do this then you need to do that. You know what I mean. I can honestly say even if me and him were not sleeping together we will always remain friends. One thing I can say is we were friends before lovers. Well time for me to get dinner finished just had that on my mind. TTYL everyone have a safe and happy Memorial Day Weekend. No DUI's

Today was a great day

Today was a very good day. It started off rocky but after I took my test and found out I passed the FBI test. I was so excited, even if I don't make it to the next step I am still proud of myself and I haven't been that in a long time. It felt good to see that email and know that out of thousands of people they choose me. It's still shocking they actually picked me to sit for the exam and I aced it. Tomorrow I am going to get my sons Birthday cake before I kill him. He has been bugging me about this birthday cake. Yesterday was funny also I talked Dre into driving me to go get my home girl Lisa and drive her around. That was a funny afternoon these two cracking me up about my skirt I had on and talking about relationships. I am telling you it was to funny. I went to see Avengers the other day and I personally endorse that movie. It's a movie I would go see again. I am going to see Batman and Spider Man when they come out also. Well I have a paper due in a couple of days and I am going to chill for the weekend. I wanted to go home but of course my truck situation is up in the air right now so I am stay put. I guess I will finish this paper and figure out how to make some extra money. Other then that I hope everyone has a great weekend and don't let no one bring your joy down. I have been doing that for awhile, and it's no ones fault but my own. I have let  things and people influence me to not do the right thing for me and I am not about to let that happen anymore. This job is a open window. You know how they say God never closes a door without opening a window...This job is one in a million, hell it's one in a million to get a email from them let alone sit for the test. Working for the FBI is my window and I am going to take it and run with it. I prayed the other night when I was crying on the phone with my mom and I clearly said God I can't do this anymore its all in your hands. After I said that two days later I received this email and I prayed before I took the test and I received a passing score. My mom is right God isn't dead and he ant sleep. I thought I was a big screw up in a lot of things. But looking back I did wrong just like everyone else has done wrong. But unlike others I am owning up to my wrongs and not trying to sweep my wrongs under the rug. I acknowledge everything I have done and owned up to everything. I am telling you people until you own up to your mistakes you will never be able to move on. I feel free of all the burden and all the wrongs, and all the lies. I may never get married,  or find that special one for me. But hey at least I can say I am happy being alone and I am happy with my life. Everything isn't perfect but I am alive, I have food, my lights are on, I have a roof over me and my kids head. The past week or so I have really had my faith tested and I realize its not all about the big things, you have to love the little things in life. I think that's where my relationship went wrong there was no communication and it was all about the big things never the little things like saying I am sorry or are you ok. Those words take nothing to say but if you never hear them how are you going to know if that person is there for you or are they their just because they don't want to be alone and you are a here for now thing. Well time for me to get my work done. Have a Blessed Weekend everyone TTYL..

Long TIme

Hey everyone it’s been a long time since the last time I was on here. I said I was going to lay off blogging for a bit so I did. Now I am back to release some stress and update what’s been going on with me. Well last week was a bad week for me I was in a car accident but I am ok and my truck is being fixed right now. No one thinks to lower their dutiable until after the accident, even though mines is $750 that's not bad but that's a lot of money to try to come up with and still pay your regular monthly expensive especially when you can only count on yourself to help you do it. As far as my love life right now it’s pretty much in stale mate. If you know anything about the game chess you would know that means it’s not going anywhere. My X is moving to South Carolina and I was seriously thinking about moving down there with him but I saw something’s that made me change my mind. I just can't move somewhere I know no body and risk the chance of being UN happy. I have my kids to think about and I am not about to have them bouncing around the world behind me following some man. I just can't see myself doing that. I told him that and of course he blew up, but hey I had to do what’s right for me and he has to do what's right for himself I can only respect that. I have no hard feeling that’s life you win some you lose some. In my opinion he's putting all this blame on Dre and he really has nothing to do with what went on between me and my X because truth be told my X was stepping out back in 2010 I didn't start hanging out with Dre until 2011. But that's water under the bridge. I got some good news people. I received an email from the FBI about an Intelligence position. I can't wait to see where this goes and I am all for this job. I need to take charge of my life and not worry about all the access drama. I have no problem having a career, my children and no relationship. Although my kids were looking forward to me and my X working out our differences it just wasn't in the cards. But they are young and they will soon get over it and realize mommy has to live her life for her and not to make another man happy. Life is about give and take and relationships are what you put into them. So if you don't put your all into them then they will never work, and honestly neither one of us has put our all into this relationship in a long time. Without trust and respect there is no relationship, better to end as friends then end as enemies. Well gotta roll TTYL. Kiss Kiss.

The job offer

I can't believe I have made it to the next round of interviews for this job in Madison WI. I am see about the next couple of steps before I go visit Madison. Wisconsin is so damn cold but 70K a year will get me moving and maybe I might just be happier with a new start. I am miss my family and friends but I can't seem to find a good job here so I have no choice. I talked to my kids and they are fine with us leaving. I don't care what their fathers say because I am raising these kids alone so they are a non factor. I am single and I have no relationship ties here anymore so nothing is holding me back. I have been looking for homes and they are so nice out their big yards near the water. I would love to share that with someone but that's not in my cards right now. Who knows maybe my dream man is in Madison. LOL So yes guys I have made up my mind if they offer me the job which it's looking good I will be packing up the truck and moving. Except this time NorthAmerica will be moving us and we will be on Delta waiting to land. I am miss Maryland and I am miss everyone. But this job is the salary I have always wanted to make plus I have stock options and room to grow in the company. Well keep praying for us. TTYL

Lost of Faith

I have worked so hard to get where I am. I have been applying to every job I can think of and I was getting to the point I was about to give up. Today I got a email that I was qualified for a federal job. I have to keep the faith. With everything going on in my life it's hard to keep that faith. I am down on my luck and now is the time for me to figure out what's going on in my life and where I want to take certain things. Now that I am going through hard times certain people have abandoned me but hey that's ok. God will help me get through what I am going through. All the stress depending on other people I don't need that and I don't need people in my life who are only there for me when I can help them. Well time for me to lay back down and figure somethings out.

Realization

I titled this blog realization because after this weekend I heard a couple of voice mails on my phone and several text messages and came to the realization that I need to move on and be by my damn self. I am not going to let anyone I don't care who you are talk to me or talk about me like I was talked to this past weekend. I had a wonderful time this past weekend and I don't care who knows it. Some people are just thrown off their rocker especially when they know you are not together and they know you are going away with someone else. But I am so over that, and him telling me he has company and asking me for an address to a club in Ocean City didn't make me feel bad at all. I know what's what and I know who has my back 100% and not only when they are getting what they want. I will be 30 this year and I am planning to go to either Scandals Bahamas Resort or One and Only Resort in Jamaica. That whole week I will not be worried about other people and their problems. I will be chilling with whom ever I decide to ask to go with me. They will only be going if they can pay their half also.

Life is to short to be sitting up here worried about who he is with or what he is doing. I don't ask him to worry about what I am doing. Hell if he cared about what I was doing he wouldn't of turned on me so fast. He wouldn't of walked away now would he. But guess what he's mad and we all know why he is mad. His main plan with the other chick didn't go where he wanted it so he thinks I can't do no better then him and I should fall back in line like a little solider. Bull Shit I had plans made when he was running behind the other women's skirt tail. Just because his road lead to no where doesn't mean I have to make a U-turn and pick him back up. It just means I make better choices in the people I surround myself around. I can go the rest of my life and not have to deal with this tug a war between me, him, and the other guy. But after being disrespected the way I was this past weekend no one has to worry about playing tug a nothing. What else is real funny this man comes to my home state with the other women in a rental car he asked me to pay for drives past me to go to the airport and doesn't think about my feelings. But I go to a resort where he was TALKING about taking me: I put TALKING in caps because that's all it was TALK...and I get called all types of names. See there's no color to anything he does it's all black and white and I should be the sweet girlfriend and throw away a great friendship and a great weekend because he wants to be a child and pout. He can keep pouting over that spilled milk because guess what I am be alright. DEUCES back to you. I was born in this world alone and I will leave it the same way. TTYL

hey

Hey everyone I haven' blogged in a min but I haven't forgotten about this blog either. This past weekend was like no other weekend. I spent time with Dre at a beautiful resort and had a blast. Taking time for myself was all I needed to do this weekend. Not having no drama follow me this weekend was a big focus of mines, and with his help we had no drama this weekend. I mean we had a speed bump while at dinner and a movie but it was handled the way it needed to be handled. I don't like people calling me a lire when I clearly didn't turn my phone off. I never turn my phone off. All of the texting and yelling was so uncalled for, this weekend was planned to be peaceful and that's what it was at the end of the night. People say I am not there for them but they fail to realize I was the only one there when they didn't have anyone there for them. But I guess that doesn't count...I am not going to sit back and cry over something or someone that clearly doesn't accept me for who I am. I am not going into detail about the drama that was brought to me this weekend. But please believe I don't have to worry about that mess anymore. It's funny how someone says they are not going to call you but then all they do is call you and text you. Then turn around and say I don't have any time for them. I was on vacation from my own mess. If what this person needed to say to me was so important they would of texted me not the other way around and all of this I needed you talk wouldn't of came when they found out where I was at this past weekend. That's all I am saying....I have some financial things going on in my life and I will work these problems out and be back on my A game. But please believe I clearly see who's in my corner and who's not in my corner. So this is tree shaking time and I don't need no fake leaves in my circle. I am post some pics I took of the room they are so nice...we will be going back very soon for a much longer stay. Now it's time for me to think about what I want for my B-Day..I am thinking Vegas or somewhere we need Passports...LOL